relationship break up

[jrobinson200]

im 24 and hae been with my boyfriend since we were15. we hav been having minor problems for i would say 2 years, and major problems the past year. we have mentiuoned splitting up a few times over the past few months and in the last hour have split up. i dont think he has taken it seriously tho as there was no eomtion from him whatsoever, whereas i feel heartbroekn. part of me feel sthis is for the best and i will ne happier in the long run, but part oif me just wants a bug hug off him. he didnt trust me one biut and i havent been out to a club for years. we dont live togeteher so thats not a problem. i know now he will be texting or calling in the next few days adnd i need to deicde if i am going to stay strong and tel him it is still over or if i am going to get back with him.
last time we 'split' i felt awful and we got bakc together the next day, which felt nice. but the problems didnt go away

[jrobinson200]

yeah im glad i know where i stand but god i am SCARED! not been single for 9 YEARS!! what if noone wants me? i can get clingy, i need to work on that i dnt wanna be a control frea!! omg im scared

[sara3]

gosh J, one day at a time!

take it easy and just discover how it is to be yourself. do the stuff you've been wanting to do and just live. you';; be fine :o)

[jrobinson200]

emotional crutch?

[jno]

you did the right thing. Someone who doesn't trust you, someone who says a text is messing with his mind.... you need someone grown up, and it doesn't sound as if he has. That's the problem being with someone you've known since you were a kid: he may decide to stay a kid. Sometimes childhood romances last, but more often they don't. You won't get over him quickly, not after nearly 10 years and you only 24, but you're still young and there's a world full of adult males, some of them quite nice.

[sophie_1003]

As I said, i've been with my boyfriend since I was 15 (am now nearly 23) and if I think about what it would be like if we were to break up I get very scared at the thought of being alone but at the same time I think that although we've talked about marriage and babies I don't want that yet as still feel very young so if the worst did happen I'm not likely to end up an old maid! Well done on being strong, if I were you I'd get out to a night club for the first time in years to celebrate!

[123ftd]

this sounds like de ja vu for me 20 years ago. i went through the very same thing with my first love and it was so hard to let go but what i say to you is whats meant to be will be. go let your hair down a bit your still young and see how you feel in a few months time . you need to sit him down and talk to him and tell him he needs to listen .

[jrobinson200]

123 sit him down and talk to him about what tho? theres nothing to say anymore all i want to say to him is go mad, i cant believe he hasnt got in contact with me today i hate him for that.

[sophie_1003]

poodicat- its that sort of comment that makes me determined to make my relationship work!

[sara3]

I married the man I was with from school days.

I'm divorced.

[jno]

easier said than done but don't waste time hating him; what do you want him to do? Change overnight? He's had years and it hasn't happened; it's not going to happen tonight. Now is the time to start thinking of yourself. Have you got friends or family who'd give you company for a few days, just to fill the gap he's left?

[jrobinson200]

yeah jno im going shopping tomor with friends, then gotfamily coming over for tea. sunday hopefully meeting a friend, monday going into work to get my hair done, tues doin something with a firend, wed hopefully meeting an old friend in the evening and thurs back in work which i cant wait for.
i dont hate him for not changin, i hate him for not even ringing or texting me today, how has he found it so easy or at least done it, im dying to text himm so much so much. like i say he never used to trust me yet now hes not even bothered where i am and what im doing?

[jrobinson200]

thanks for that!

[jrobinson200]

we fairly good day today, went to meet friend and went shopping,which was hrd at first wanted to turn round and go home but glad i didnt we had a nice lunch and a chat, shes in the same position as me so nice. then went home, felt upset again and ended up txting him, using his stuff ive got as an excuse, he was civil reallt and told me stop stressing and relax. had family round tonight was ok, distracted me and arranged to go sledging with them in morn, then to m firends for dinner and wine in evening! so im feeling excited right now. still got the knotted sick stomach but this very minute i feel ok. wait another half hour and ill be crying

[jrobinson200]

haha IF anyone is still sbsribed to this.......over a year later an last year was MY BEST YEAR EVER!!! couldnt have been any better!! im seeing someone else but am so inependant i have the best of both world.s Ive grown up so much and enjoy every single day. Im going travelling in July and cant believe the difference!!!