Psychologically, what's the best way to help someone deal with bullying?

[annie0000]

My son who is now 11 has had to deal with bullying over a number of years, the physical and verbal stuff has stopped, but they basically make no attempt to hide that they don't like him and exclude and intimidate him. The main issue is that he doesn't like football!! of all the stupid things to pick on someone for.

Anyway he is off to High School after the summer and has asked us to help him have a fresh start - he doesn't want to go to school with his class and we are attempting to make that happen for him. After a bit of debate, I think we all believe that it is the right thing to do. He does have a small handful of friends and 1 best friend (who is in the same boat as him).

I think it is pointless trying to do anything more to integrate him into the class - it's flogging a dead horse and actually at this point I wouldn't want any of them to be his friends.

What I want to do is give him the confidence to move on and for it to be a successful fresh start for him. I've been telling him just to ignore it and that it doesn't matter and that it is their loss etc. However the difficulty is that it does bloody matter, they are behaving like little sh!tes and it's not fair and I am so bleeding angry I could scream!!!!

Whats the best way for a) me to stop feeling so angry about it so that I can help him better. and b) me to help him come to terms with it, hopefully draw a line under it and move on?

Thanks

[Rodge2]

I've sometimes heard people say that learning martial arts can make children more confident - in fact a very deprived school I used to do supply teaching at brought in Judo classes for all the children as part of the curriculum for that very reason. I think it tends to make them more able to handle themselves - not for fighting you understand - since they are taught very strict discipline alongside it. Worth a try?

[annie0000]

thanks, I've heard that too rodge - he did Judo for 3 years - he didn't want to do it anymore and so we let him give up on the basis that we were giving him some control over his life which was also to boost his self esteem - you get caught between a rock and hard place sometimes :o)