Film, Media & TV0 min ago
Oldies
Why does a milking stool have only 3 legs?
Because the cow has the udder.
Why do bees hum?
Because they don't know the words!
How do crazy people go through the forest?
They take the psycho path.
What do Eskimos get from sitting on the ice too long?
Polaroids.
What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?
Frostbite.
What is a zebra?
26 sizes larger than an "A" bra.
What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup?
Anyone can roast beef.
How do you catch a unique animal?
Unique up on him
What did the girl melon say to the boy melon when he proposed to her?
We're too young... we cantaloupe!
Why wouldn't the lobster share his toys?
Because he was shellfish
Have you heard the joke about the bed?
It hasn't been made up yet.
What has five legs, three eyes and two tails?
A dog with spare parts.
What did one dandelion say to the other dandelion?
Take me to your weeder!
Did you hear about the Italian Chef that died?
He pasta way.
Did you hear about the circus fire?
It was intense.
Why do sea-gulls fly over the sea?
Because if they flew over the bay they would be bagels!
What happened to the butcher when he backed up into the meat grinder?
He got a little behind in his orders.
What's a Wok?
Something you throw at a Wabbit.
Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants?
In case he gets a hole in one!
Why did the ram go off the end of the cliff?
Because he didn't see the ewe turn.
Why did the dolphin kill himself?
He had no porpoise in his life!
When do you have the right to scold your coffee?
When you have more than sufficient grounds.
Why wouldn't the butterfly go to the dance?
It was a moth ball
What do you call a pig that does karate?
Pork chop!
Because the cow has the udder.
Why do bees hum?
Because they don't know the words!
How do crazy people go through the forest?
They take the psycho path.
What do Eskimos get from sitting on the ice too long?
Polaroids.
What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?
Frostbite.
What is a zebra?
26 sizes larger than an "A" bra.
What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup?
Anyone can roast beef.
How do you catch a unique animal?
Unique up on him
What did the girl melon say to the boy melon when he proposed to her?
We're too young... we cantaloupe!
Why wouldn't the lobster share his toys?
Because he was shellfish
Have you heard the joke about the bed?
It hasn't been made up yet.
What has five legs, three eyes and two tails?
A dog with spare parts.
What did one dandelion say to the other dandelion?
Take me to your weeder!
Did you hear about the Italian Chef that died?
He pasta way.
Did you hear about the circus fire?
It was intense.
Why do sea-gulls fly over the sea?
Because if they flew over the bay they would be bagels!
What happened to the butcher when he backed up into the meat grinder?
He got a little behind in his orders.
What's a Wok?
Something you throw at a Wabbit.
Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants?
In case he gets a hole in one!
Why did the ram go off the end of the cliff?
Because he didn't see the ewe turn.
Why did the dolphin kill himself?
He had no porpoise in his life!
When do you have the right to scold your coffee?
When you have more than sufficient grounds.
Why wouldn't the butterfly go to the dance?
It was a moth ball
What do you call a pig that does karate?
Pork chop!
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