The Glasgow Banter

[Fanriffic]

A stranger to Glasgow met his pal at Central Station. It was obvious that someone had recently punched his face.
His pal asked, "What on earth happened to you then?"
The chap replied, "I've no idea why, but a barmaid just belted me in the face! I was just killing a bit of time in a pub and my luggage bag was in the way, so I asked the barman if he would mind keeping it behind the bar. He was happy to do this for me. When I went back to collect it later, this barmaid was on duty. All I said to her was, 'Any chance of getting my holdall?' and she hit me!"

[Hopkirk]

No, sorry, translation needed.

[sidkid]

This may help...
http://www.theanswerb...s/Question579460.html

[tenrec]

I'm sure it's funny but can't understand glaswegian!

[Fanriffic]

Hole Doll (holdall). Nat King Cole.
A pretty woman in Scotland is often called a doll.
A large bag in Glasgow is sometime called a holdall.

[erin-x]

Haha!!! XD

[Hopkirk]

One Scot asks "Furry boots?"

The other replies "Dundee"

[THECORBYLOON]

"Any chance of getting ma hole, doll?"

[sunny-dave]

Teacher : "Jimmy, use the word 'meringue' in a sentence"

Jimmy : "All weegies are amazeballs, or a meringue ?"

[karenmac60]

One of my colleagues says 'want your holdall?' a lot and it has mr mac in stitches every time :)

[maggiebee]

Like the joke sunny-dave: Man walks into a cake shop and says "is that a doughnut or a meringue?" "You're right" says the assistant "it's a doughnut."

[HowardKennitby]

If it was a typical Glasgow establishment I think the normal reply would have been 'yes'.