For Sqad: What patient's hear when Doctor's speak.

[Noraq]

"He said I need to get a test done for 'Helicopter Polaris' "

[Noraq]

=)

[Sqad]

LOL.

The very common one is "the doctor says i have titiness."

[tenrec]

Those answers are so funny.

[Noraq]

=)

[tenrec]

I have a lapoma (I think that's the name). I got home and googled Lapoma, only to find I had a greek island!

[Hopkirk]

Translation please - helicopter polaris

[bookbinder]

Hopkirk - I thought I must be the only one who didn't get it!

[Sqad]

Helicobacter pylori

An organism thought to be responsible for the majority of gastric and duodenal ulcers.

Google it.

[Hopkirk]

Thanks Sqad.

If it's to do with smelly bits, do you mind if I don't google?

[Sqad]

Hopkirk....LOL...I can think of "smellier" bits.

[lozzer50]

lol

[Duncer]

As someone who used to work in a busy casualty many, many moons ago, back in the dark days in Belfast, I was approached by a woman late one night at the office window, and she had a small boy with her but, being about eight or nine, he didn't even reach the ledge of the window and was obscured from view.

As she rummaged in her shopping bag she proclaimed, "It's my wee lad's head".

Not having seen said "wee lad" I had visions of her producing his head from the aforementioned bag.

[parkie]

Reminds me of Dirk Bogart playing Doctor in the House. He's examining a busty teenager, puts his stethoscope on he chest and says. "Big breaths."
She replies "Yeth. And I'm only thixteen."

[mrs_overall]

When I used to set scuba diving theory exams, some of the answers were funny.

One question was "Name the tube that connects the ear to the throat?"
One person answered "Fallopian tube" and another answered "Euston Station tube"