Crosswords1 min ago
Are You From Yorkshire?
The works' boss, "Young Mr Peter" had to tell old Joe it was time for him to retire after 60 years with the firm.
The old man was indignant:
"So, it's come to this, 'as it? Ah'm not wanted any longer?
Ah worked for thi dad, thi grandad and 'is dad an' all.
Ah tell thi what lad, if Ah'd known this job weren't going to be permanent, Ah'd nivver 'ahe tekken it on".
A photographer up t'hi street advertised that he could retouch photographs.
So in walks this woman with a picture of 'er departed husband.
I'd like this 'eer photo retouched, and while yer at it remove his 'at. I nivver did like that 'at.
Aye said t'photographer chap. Now just before you go missus I must know which side he parted his hair.
E by gum lad, you must think I am reight daft, you'll find that out when you take his 'at off.
A couple had been courting for nearly twenty years and one day as they sat on a seat in the park she plucked up courage and asked.
'Don't you think it's time we wed?'
He answered.
'Aye lass, but who'd ave us?'
A Yorkshire farmer went into a jewellers shop in Harrogate.
He was constantly chewing. The salesgirl said, "Can I help you Sir?"
"Aye" he said, still chewing. "I'd like one 'o them theer rings".
"Yes Sir, wedding or engagement?"
"Wedding, tha nos", he said, chewing constantly.
"Gold or Silver?", said the salesgirl, watching him chewing.
"Gold", he said.
"Eighteen Carats?", said the girl.
"Nay lass", he said. "It's toffee and it's stuck in me teeth".
The old man was indignant:
"So, it's come to this, 'as it? Ah'm not wanted any longer?
Ah worked for thi dad, thi grandad and 'is dad an' all.
Ah tell thi what lad, if Ah'd known this job weren't going to be permanent, Ah'd nivver 'ahe tekken it on".
A photographer up t'hi street advertised that he could retouch photographs.
So in walks this woman with a picture of 'er departed husband.
I'd like this 'eer photo retouched, and while yer at it remove his 'at. I nivver did like that 'at.
Aye said t'photographer chap. Now just before you go missus I must know which side he parted his hair.
E by gum lad, you must think I am reight daft, you'll find that out when you take his 'at off.
A couple had been courting for nearly twenty years and one day as they sat on a seat in the park she plucked up courage and asked.
'Don't you think it's time we wed?'
He answered.
'Aye lass, but who'd ave us?'
A Yorkshire farmer went into a jewellers shop in Harrogate.
He was constantly chewing. The salesgirl said, "Can I help you Sir?"
"Aye" he said, still chewing. "I'd like one 'o them theer rings".
"Yes Sir, wedding or engagement?"
"Wedding, tha nos", he said, chewing constantly.
"Gold or Silver?", said the salesgirl, watching him chewing.
"Gold", he said.
"Eighteen Carats?", said the girl.
"Nay lass", he said. "It's toffee and it's stuck in me teeth".
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