Adhd In Adults

[Scarlett]

At the moment I am giving private lessons to a man of 24 who has ADHD. If he feels he is making mistakes or doesn't think he is doing very well in the lesson, he gets really cross. He has to sit and sulk, gets angry- not with me- but with himself. I then have to counsel him for the rest of the session to try and get him back to normal in time to leave! I feel unqualified to do this and actually feel a little bit threatened by his aggression, even though he is not aggressive to me- just he raises his voice in frustration. I don't want to give up on him, nor do I want to tell him to just pull himself together! Any thoughts on the best way to deal with this? Most of the time he is fine, it is just occasionally he gets these black outbursts.

[Scarlett]

Also he does seem to suffer from mood swings- when he is 'high' he tics and twitches. I wonder if he has something else undiagnosed?

[black_cat51]

it is not your job to diagnose him, or to worry about his diagnosis (IMHO). Just teach him, If you feel uncomfortable doing it or threatened, then stop. If you are happy at the way the lessons go, carry on

[albaqwerty]

I have no experience of adhd so can't offer much in the way of advice.

Do you know his GP? Does he live with his parent(s)
Does he have anyone else who he is in contact with in a professional capacity that you could talk to and raise any concerns you have?

[pixie373]

Ask him what would help. My daughter has a pace around the garden with steam coming out of her ears and is fine again very quickly. He will know.

[woofgang]

alba, if he is an adult and not a vulnerable adult, then Scarlett has no right to discuss him with anybody without his knowledge and permission. Scarlett, you might ask your student if he is getting help for his outbursts?

[anneasquith]

what lessons are you giving him ?

[Prudie]

Are you just teaching him in something you have expert knowledge of or are you in a role where counselling is an expected part of the process? If the former then I don't really think you should even try. Did he say he's been diagnosed with ADHD?

[Scarlett]

I don't want to just stop as he has had few chances in life- didn't get any results at school and is talented. I would just like to know how to manage it better with / for him. He lives in a shared house. His Mum apparently is identical to him, so probably has ADHD too. She found it very hard to cope with him as a child and adult. He was offered drugs but didn't want to take them. He has been diagnosed. I am teaching him music one to one, as he plans to go to college and needs help preparing, which yes, I am expert in and qualified in, to teach, but I'm not expert on SEN or adults with ADHD.

[anneasquith]

giving the behaviour he presents,do you think he enjoys the lessons.

[black_cat51]

well then the best thing to do as said is to just ask him what would be the most useful way forward for him. don't feel guilty if you do want to stop - it wouldn't be like you were ruining his chances - there are hundreds of music teachers and if you feel uncomfy, just let someone else teach him

[Scarlett]

He does enjoy the lessons- he just gets very frustrated when he thinks he can do better, or thinks he sounds bad!