Unwanted attention

[alijangra]

A female that I know (a friend of a friend) keeps coming on to me. She goes out on our girly nights out and once she has a few she cant keep her eyes off me, she has also tried to kiss me in a nightclub when we were briefly left alone together. She is a very attractive girl and I suspect she is used to getting what she wants, but Im not that way inclined (she insists I am, but am in denial!). Its getting to the point now that I dread going out because she makes me uncomfortable, she even tells blokes that me and her are going to get it on! Im no prude, I dance with my mates and fool around when Im out but there is a line and she has crossed it. What do I do? She works with a very close friend of mine so I dont want to cause any trouble. I have told her I not interested yet she persists to grab my bottom etc and it starting to P me off a bit.

[Andy008]

"She is a very attractive girl...but i'm not that way inclined"

In a single sentence you've just contradicted yourself.

Did you ever hear the tale about the man who, on his deathbed, stated that his greatest regret was having slept with so many women?

No? Thought not.

Just grit your teeth and do it. You might get hit by a bus tomorrow.

[electricblue]

As you've told her you are not that way then she is seriously taking the p*ss,i'm amazedat yourrestraint cos by now i would have belted her,have you told the other girls what she's up to?The close mate that she works with would maybe tell her to leave it out,failing that are they really as good a mates as you hope?

[elleroo]

Andy008...get a grip. you can call someone attractive without fancying them. oh dear is that how you think? scary.
anyway, i agree with electricblue, friend or no friend i would have lost my temper by now. i think you should say something about it.

[mycatis]

Andy- I think alijangra is a woman (hope I'm right) but the point is this attention is unwanted and no-one has the right to touch anyone sexually if they say no!! ou are just gonna have to be firm with her. Say no loudly and clearly next time she comes near you, make sure everyone hears you. this is sexual harrasment!

[Andy008]

Erm...alright didnt read the post and initially thought it was a bloke..! Sorry.

[jno]

quite right, cat. Doesn't matter what the sex of either person is, this is harassment. If you'd feel confident about repelling an unwanted male, alijangra, do the same to her as you would if it was a him. (Though possibly a knee in the goolies wouldn't work quite as well in this case.)

[alijangra]

Andy, I am able to say a girl is attractive without fancying her I am not contradicting myself at all. I am not interested in her sexually as I am not bisexual. I am very comfortable with my sexuality. Apart from that I am in a commited long term relationship with a man I love and fancy very much!!

I just find it hard to say anything as I dont want to cause problems, she apparently has just newly 'come out' as being bisexual so my mate saysI should just be flattered and politely decline her advances. I have tried being polite, I think I will just stay in for a few weeks and hope she finds herself another girl to harrass!!

[alijangra]

Im really not very good with confrontation, I would be more inclined to run and hide :(

[mycatis]

I have to say being "bisexual" seems to very trendy just now! Just tell her the same thing you would tell a guy who was coming onto you. but talk to your friend, see if she can have a word with her. good luck

[alijangra]

Thanks guys I thought I might be over-reacting but it seems not. I will try standing up to her on Saturday night, she might just feel the sharp end of my stiletto heel somewhere unpleasant ;)

[gazzawazza]

Why should you have to stay in for a few weeks? I still don't think that would give her the message.

I agree with what the others have said, be firm, tell her in no uncertain terms that you are not interested and never will be, and if necessary, do it in front of others.

[jimboy2]

not being base here but my god what a premise for a porn film!! this women who is attracitve used to getting what she wants and another girl trying so hard to resist....but eventually..... oops i was thinking and typing at same time there!

[alijangra]

sorry to burst your bubble jimboy but I wont be giving in!!

[*Zeus*]

tell her in front of all your mates in a quiet pub that you are sick of it and that you will do her for assault if she ever does it again.

[alijangra]

She does it like she is mucking about though so I would probably look like some uptight nutcase

[jimboy2]

oh please please give in cause then your next question on answer bank could be "am i straight or lesbionic? can any men help?"

.....how great would that be!!!!!!!!!