BANANASPLITS Member Profile in The AnswerBank

This Is Hard Work

As some of you may know Mrs B is in KCH Camberwell, B has been visiting almost daily, he has had the last 2 days off as other family have been visiting, she sees someone every day. As B has had time...

gness

Dave Is Being Uncooperative.....

We're having a wonderful Halloween......lots of kids in great costumes but there's a problem..... When I slowly open the door and make creaking noises as I expose the witch in the hall with the...

retrocop

Daily Char

My mate just hired an Eastern European cleaner, took her 15 hours to hoover the house. Turns out she was a Slovak....

AB Editor

Will you partake in trick-or-treating on Halloween?

retrocop

Warranty

Just A Reminder to those who stole Electrical Goods in Last Year's Riots...... Your One Year Manufacturer's Warranty Runs Out Soon....

BANANASPLITS

Halloween. .....

I got so fed up with trick or treaters at Halloween that in the end I turned the lights out and pretended I wasn't in. I Forget about the ships....I lost my job as a lighthouse keeper!

kvalidir

Werewolf

Kid came to our door on Halloween looking for candy. I said 'What have you come as?' 'A Werewolf' he replied. 'But you haven't got a costume on, you're just wearing normal clothes' 'DUH it's not a...

Shaglene

Rocky..............

One Halloween a trick-or-treater came to my door dressed as "Rocky" in boxing gloves and satin shorts. Soon after I gave him some goodies, he returned for more. "Aren't you the same 'Rocky' who left...

cupid04

What Kind...

Q) What kind of bees make milk? A) Boob - bees!...

Patsy33

A Friend

A friend of mine lost his job at a fish supplies company. He opened a whole can of worms....

sunny-dave

Waitrose Has Previous ...

... in the cock-up department. Why you never put a bald bloke on the cover of a stacking magazine : http://i.imgur.com/hzsh4.jpg http://i.imgur.com/WDyiu4L.jpg...

Shaglene

A Visit To The Doctors...............

During a visit to my doctor, I asked him, " How do you determine whether or not an older person should be put in an old age home?" "Well," he said, "we fill up a bathtub, then we offer a teaspoon, a...

BANANASPLITS

Vivaldi

Met a gorgeous girl at a party last night she said people call her vivaldi. I asked " is it because your a fantastic violinist" "No mate me names viv and I work at aldi!...

Ric.ror

Ebay - Last Buy?

What was the last thing you bought on eBay? Mine was rosemary seeds...

DTCwordfan

One For Bananasplits

A Japanese couple is arguing about how to perform highly erotic sex. Husband: "Sukitaki. Mojitaka!" The wife replies: "Kowanini! Mowi janakpa!" The husband says angrily: "Toka a anji rodi roumi...

Canary42

Trick Or Treat ?

What do you use as treats ?

smurfchops

Zinc Tablets?

I take Levothyroxin, can I take Zinc tablets as well to help my immune system?...

Patsy33

Which..

Which Spice girl can hold the most petrol? Geri can....

Cloverjo

Memory Lapse

Just had a weird memory lapse similar to Smowball's a week or so ago. I was turning up a pair of trousers with Wonderweb, did one leg, went to do the other but found I'd already done it. Felt very...

Kha1

Politic

Will trump be elected again

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