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berniecuddles

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berniecuddles

Dr Sqad!

A patient was in the hospital recovering from surgery when a nurse asks him how he is feeling. “I’m OK but I didn't like the four-letter-word that doctor sqad used in surgery,” he answered....
11:50 Sun 01st Sep 20139 answers, last by berniecuddles 12:25 Sun 01st Sep 2013
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berniecuddles

Little Johnny!

A stranger was seated next to Little Johnny on the plane when the stranger turned to the Little Johnny and said, "Let's talk. I've heard that flights will go quicker if you strike up a conversation...
08:39 Sun 01st Sep 20136 answers, last by bluetiger 09:27 Sun 01st Sep 2013
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berniecuddles

Some One Liners For Ya!!

I tried to catch some Fog. I mist. When chemists die, they barium. Jokes about German sausage are the wurst. A soldier who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran. I know a guy...
11:03 Sat 31st Aug 20133 answers, last by markoffthebike 14:14 Mon 30th Sep 2013
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berniecuddles

Star Wars!

How did Darth Vader know what Luke got him for Christmas? He felt his presents!...
10:53 Sat 31st Aug 20133 answers, last by cupid04 10:59 Sat 31st Aug 2013
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berniecuddles

Olympic Condoms!

A man is out shopping and discovers a new brand of Olympic condoms. Clearly impressed, he buys a pack. Upon getting home he announces to his wife the purchase he just made. “Olympic condoms?”, she...
20:46 Fri 30th Aug 20135 answers, last by frugalfred 21:01 Fri 30th Aug 2013
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berniecuddles

The Jockeys Wife!

The wife of the Irish jockey who had been widowed when a bus load of jockeys were killed in a crash. She had to go to the morgue to identify her husband. As she pulled back the covers she said:...
12:18 Fri 30th Aug 20134 answers, last by marval 18:32 Fri 30th Aug 2013
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berniecuddles

On The Buses!

Mick and Paddy were walking home from the pub. Mick says to Paddy, "I can't be bothered to walk all that way." "I know," says Paddy, "but we've no money for a cab and we've missed the last bus home."...
19:59 Thu 29th Aug 20135 answers, last by marval 21:08 Thu 29th Aug 2013
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berniecuddles

Johnny And Jimmy!

Johnny noticed that Jimmy was wearing a brand new, shiny watch. “Did you get that for your birthday?” – asked Johnny. “Nope.” – replied Jimmy. “Well, did you get it for Christmas...
15:00 Thu 29th Aug 20138 answers, last by marval 15:59 Thu 29th Aug 2013
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berniecuddles

Cats And Men!

Why Cats Are Better Than Men!! A CAT always hits the litterbox. Better chance of training a CAT. No matter what your CAT drags into your house, you don't have to pretend you like it. You never have to...
09:30 Thu 29th Aug 20136 answers, last by excelsior-1 14:39 Thu 29th Aug 2013
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berniecuddles

Good Morning Early Birds!

morning all what a lovely day yesterday tidied up the garden and resealed the conservatory roof (had a leak) looks like today is going to be nice as well
03:52 Thu 29th Aug 201383 answers, last by LochNessMonster 07:29 Thu 29th Aug 2013
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berniecuddles

Fore...........!!

A man staggers into a hospital with concussion, Multiple bruises, two black eyes and a 5 iron wrapped tightly around his throat. The doctor asked "What happened to you?" "Well I was playing Golf with...
19:53 Wed 28th Aug 20135 answers, last by excelsior-1 14:43 Thu 29th Aug 2013
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berniecuddles

At The Bank!

I was at my bank today waiting in a short line. There was just one lady in front of me, an Asian lady, who was trying to exchange yen for dollars. It was obvious she was a little irritated. She asked...
09:59 Wed 28th Aug 20133 answers, last by marval 17:07 Wed 28th Aug 2013
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berniecuddles

Good Morning Early Birds!

good morning all! oh well back to the grind had a couple of days off work still only 3 days to do this week soon be over! 2 weeks and one day til my holiday almost there cant wait to go...
03:35 Wed 28th Aug 2013119 answers, last by Dee Sa 07:56 Wed 28th Aug 2013
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berniecuddles

Screwed Wife....!

A man walks into a crowded local bar brandishing a revolver yelling “Who’s been screwing my wife?” A voice from the back of the bar shouts back, “You don’t have enough ammo, mate!”...
18:51 Tue 27th Aug 2013
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berniecuddles

Antennas......!

Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love and got married. The Ceremony wasn't much, but the reception was excellent....
15:49 Tue 27th Aug 20133 answers, last by AlwaysConfused 17:13 Tue 27th Aug 2013
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berniecuddles

For Svejk!!!!!

A man is in a hotel lobby. He wants to ask the clerk a question. As he turns to go to the front desk, he accidentally bumps into a woman beside him and as he does, his elbow goes into her breast. They...
12:52 Tue 27th Aug 201310 answers, last by frugalfred 17:37 Tue 27th Aug 2013
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berniecuddles

Back From Eye Clinic!

just got back from having 6th monthly diabetic eye check up at hospital,doctor well happy said eyes 100% doesn't want to see me for a year so that's a lot off my mind well happy!
12:34 Tue 27th Aug 201332 answers, last by albaqwerty 15:04 Tue 27th Aug 2013
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berniecuddles

Cheese!!

Cheesy jokes. What cheese is made backwards? Edam!-- What sort of cheese makes you taller? Stilt on.-- What cheese do you use to hide a horse? Mask-a-pony. - What cheese do you use to encourage bears?...
10:25 Sat 24th Aug 2013
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berniecuddles

Ebay!!!!!!!!

Q: Whats the difference between ebay and a cactus? A: On a cactus the pricks are on the outside....
09:54 Fri 23rd Aug 20133 answers, last by JacksonsMom 09:59 Fri 23rd Aug 2013
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berniecuddles

Good Morning Early Birds!

morning all yaaay its fri another week nearer xmas !!!supposed to be a sunny day today we will see!
03:45 Fri 23rd Aug 2013150 answers, last by FredPuli43 08:27 Fri 23rd Aug 2013

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