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Berniecuddles2

101 to 120 of 1438

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NoMercy
What wouldn't you do, even in your our of desperation? No matter how starving hungry I was, I couldn't eat a KFC. Also, if I was desperate for the loo to the point where my bladder couldn't hold much...
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NoMercy
What, in your opinion, is the best biscuit in the universe? For an everyday biscuit, for texture and dunkability, you just can't beat a Jammie Dodger. However, for all-round awesomeness, I'm simply...
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Berniecuddles2
Got the wife a new fridge today as a surprise , her face lit up when she opened it
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Berniecuddles2
"Black really is slimming on you, you've never looked sexier" I assured the missus "Turn the light back on you ***!" she replied...
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Just-Jude
Labour, a melting pot of Nazis, Fascists and Communists. Is this the most degenerate political party that Britain has ever known?
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Patsy33
With all this shiit on the TV these days, I think it's about time our parrot went back in its cage....
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bobtheturkey
I am new here
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-SharonA-
My wife just found out I replaced our bed with a trampoline; she hit the roof.
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Berniecuddles2
A beautiful woman loves gardening, but can't seem to get her tomatoes to turn red. She asks her neighbour, "What do you do to get your tomatoes red?" He replies, "Twice a day I stand in front of my...
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Berniecuddles2
I slowly walked up to the sales lady in the clothing store “I would like to buy my wife a pretty pink lingerie set ” “How cute” exclaimed the sales lady, “sounds like it’s going to be a...
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Tilly2
It's beautifully made (in Britain), it smells gorgeous, it looks lovely in the sitting room and... it is so uncomfortable! The cushions are hard and it is so high that my feet don't touch the floor...
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Berniecuddles2
I was sitting in a bar one day and two really large women came in, talking in an interesting accent. So I said, “Cool accent, are you two ladies from Ireland?” One of them snarled at me, “It’s...
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Patsy33
What do you call a Russian with Tourette's Syndrome? Yukanol Fukov.
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queenofmean
I'd say about a year 18 months maybe most of you signed a petition to allow Diabetics to have a CGM on the NHS rather than having to fork out a small fortune. We did it! So on behalf of myself and...
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Shaglene
A group of Illinois bikers was riding west when they saw a girl about to jump off the Murray Baker Bridge . So they stopped. George, their leader, a big burly man of 53, got off his Harley, walked...
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Berniecuddles2
“A blonde girl enters a store that sells curtains. She tells the salesman, "I would like to buy a pink curtain in the size of my computer screen." The surprised salesman replies, "But, madam,...
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Berniecuddles2
“Poor Old fool,” I thought to myself as i watched an old man fish in a puddle outside the pub. So i invited the old man inside for a drink. As we sipped our whiskeys, i thought I'd humour the old...
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waterboatman
Thursday. All is tranquil outside, not even a hint of breeze, but it has been raining all night, stopped now though. Tiggy came out during the afternoon yesterday, had a rootle about and found his way...
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Buenchico
Some great music to start the day and wake everyone up. This is BETTER than the Sheppard original, partly because of the sheer energy put into the performance and partly because of the absolutely...
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Berniecuddles2
My sexual fetishes have slowly been getting more perverse. It wasn't until I smacked a statues bum that I realised I had hit rock bottom....

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