There are many weary and well-trodden euphamisms for this but do you know of a more obscure one, maybe only used by one person you know? For example, my grandmother would go to "shed a tear for...
I may even have dreamed it but I think it featured a 70s double act - it could have been Morecambe & Wise. They stayed in an hotel with a pretty girl and ended up having to stay in...