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madiba

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madiba

Now ! is this logic ?

AS A MUGGER, I get really narked when I hear pensioners moaning on about how one of their mates was mugged for 5 pounds. Well, if they would all carry 50 or 100 quid, I wouldn't have to mug so many of...
11:43 Fri 13th Jul 20122 answers, last by Starbuckone 14:36 Fri 13th Jul 2012
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madiba

The Good Doctor

I AM A good doctor about to be struck off, just for having sex with one of my patients - ten long ryears training down the drain. The British Veterinary Council  need to take a long hard look at...
11:34 Fri 13th Jul 20124 answers, last by JonnyBoy12 19:21 Sat 11th Aug 2012
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madiba

Dole

I WENT to sign on the other day and was told that I couldn't have any money due to the fact that I was in full time employment. If this government think I'm going to give up a perfectly good job just...
11:13 Fri 13th Jul 20123 answers, last by marval 13:46 Fri 13th Jul 2012
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madiba

Good News For Mice

SO SCIENTISTS claim to have found a cure for cancer in mice. Big deal. That's great news if you happen to be a mouse.. Why don't these idiots try finding a cancer cure for people? After all, it's us...
19:31 Thu 12th Jul 20123 answers, last by JonnyBoy12 19:18 Sat 11th Aug 2012
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madiba

All In A Days work

WOMEN SECRETARIES have no sense of loyalty to their employers. They're happy to cash their pay cheques, drink your coffee and use your phone, but the minute you try giving them a quick Christmas bonus...
19:21 Thu 12th Jul 20123 answers, last by marval 20:49 Thu 12th Jul 2012
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madiba

Honesty

PEOPLE say that I am as honest as the day is long. Does this mean that in winter, as the days become shorter, I become proportionately less honest, and might therefore be tempted to start shoplifting,...
16:18 Thu 12th Jul 20128 answers, last by ludwig 10:47 Fri 13th Jul 2012
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madiba

Traffic Wardens

As the coffin was being lowered into the ground at a traffic warden's funeral, a voice screamed from inside, "I'm not dead! I'm not dead!"To which the vicar shouted back, "Sorry, the...
13:15 Thu 12th Jul 20128 answers, last by Hopkirk 17:44 Thu 12th Jul 2012
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madiba

Remember September 11th

WE READ a lot in the newspapers about strategies to prevent another September 11th happening, but upon checking my calendar today, I noticed that yet another one is planned for later this year. Will...
12:49 Thu 12th Jul 20124 answers, last by tenrec 19:01 Thu 12th Jul 2012
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madiba

Dangerous dogs

IT SEEMS very unfair that people brand certain dogs as 'dangerous'. These dogs spend less that 1% of their lives biting people and yet they are branded as dangerous. 99% of the time they are not...
12:15 Thu 12th Jul 201212 answers, last by JonnyBoy12 19:13 Sat 11th Aug 2012
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madiba

Tooth paste

A NOTICE on the back of a tube of Colgate toothpaste says 'We do not make toothpaste for anyone else". Imagine my anger when my friend's tube of Colgate had exactly the same notice.
12:10 Thu 12th Jul 20123 answers, last by weecalf 12:28 Thu 12th Jul 2012
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madiba

Pringles

IF IT'S true what they say, "Once you pop, you can't stop", why are Pringles tubes resealable?
06:29 Thu 12th Jul 20123 answers, last by madiba 11:58 Thu 12th Jul 2012
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madiba

Fox Hunting

OPPONENTS of fox hunting foolishly suggest that drag hunting would be an adequate replacement for our sport. Well I for one would take no pleasure from hunting foxes dressed in women's clothing.
05:08 Thu 12th Jul 20129 answers, last by madiba 12:01 Thu 12th Jul 2012
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madiba

Compost

PLEASE can someone help me? I can't seem to think of another purpose for multi-purpose compost, other than for growing plants in.
04:55 Thu 12th Jul 201219 answers, last by ludwig 17:52 Thu 12th Jul 2012
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madiba

Your local Supermarket

I'VE HEARD that supermarkets waft bakery smells around the store to subconsciously encourage customers to buy bread. I can only conclude that my local Netto supermarket is trying to encourage its...
00:45 Thu 12th Jul 20128 answers, last by JonnyBoy12 19:11 Sat 11th Aug 2012
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madiba

N.H.S

I RECENTLY had to use a public phone box in London, and was shocked to see a card advertising advertising a 'Spanking by a naughty nurse, any time'. No wonder my mother has been waiting for a hip...
12:25 Wed 11th Jul 201210 answers, last by Marciau 21:40 Tue 31st Jul 2012
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madiba

Gibraltar Question

REGARDING the issue of whether Gibraltar should join Spain or remain part of Britain, if I lived there I would opt to join with Spain. Just think how much better the weather would be.
12:15 Wed 11th Jul 20121 answer, last by zebo 14:08 Wed 11th Jul 2012
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madiba

SMOKING

If smoking is so bad for your health How come I cures salmon ?...
12:12 Wed 11th Jul 20126 answers, last by tonyav 14:30 Wed 11th Jul 2012
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madiba

Speed Humps

THESE SO-CALLED speed humps are a joke. If anything they slow you down.
05:31 Wed 11th Jul 20127 answers, last by BRIGHT SPARK 18:45 Fri 27th Jul 2012
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madiba

Caravan Wanted

I AM INTERESTED in buying a caravan. However, I cannot find the caravan that goes with my car. If anyone has a caravan with the license plate J471 PSD could I please buy it from them?
05:24 Wed 11th Jul 201227 answers, last by sunny-dave 08:58 Wed 11th Jul 2012

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