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maggiebee

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maggiebee

Voted Best Scottish Short Joke

A bloke walks into a Glasgow lending library and says to the prim librarian, 'Excuse me Miss, dae ye hae ony books on suicide?' To which she stops doing her tasks, looks at him over the top of her...
10:44 Sun 29th Apr 201220 answers, last by MarkRae 01:25 Mon 30th Apr 2012
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maggiebee

CATS - don't you just love them.

Spent a very entertaining half an hour today watching the neighbour's cat (Dennis) trying to get to food. I had some sausages past their "sell by" date so cooked them, chopped them up and...
20:43 Fri 27th Apr 201219 answers, last by marval 19:33 Sat 28th Apr 2012
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maggiebee

Rabbie

The British PM David Cameron is visiting a Glasgow hospital. He enters a ward full of patients with no obvious sign of injury or illness. He greets one and the patient replies: "Fair fa your...
10:02 Fri 27th Apr 20126 answers, last by tenrec 16:06 Fri 27th Apr 2012
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maggiebee

The World's Most Beautiful Woman

Beyonce has been named the world's most beautiful woman 2012. Damn, thought it was me but I wasn't even in the top 10.
12:51 Thu 26th Apr 201252 answers, last by andy-hughes 21:28 Thu 26th Apr 2012
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maggiebee

Favourite Joke

Late friend of mine used to tell the same joke over and over again. My grandchildren love it and it still makes me smile. Did you hear about the wee cannibal boy? He was eight before he was seven....
00:08 Tue 24th Apr 20129 answers, last by erin-x 23:03 Tue 24th Apr 2012
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maggiebee

WHO IS THAT WOMAN?

Who on earth is that woman on the Graham Norton show on BBC1. Looks really weird in my opinion - facelift, botox?
23:49 Mon 23rd Apr 201210 answers, last by tonyav 11:09 Tue 24th Apr 2012
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maggiebee

Wallander

Thinking of reading the Wallander books, is there a logical sequence to this series. If so, which one should I start with? Thanks
18:10 Sun 22nd Apr 20126 answers, last by maggiebee 18:27 Sun 22nd Apr 2012
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maggiebee

Keep things simple at all times

At the National Art Gallery in Dublin, a husband and wife were staring at a portrait that had them completely confused. The painting depicted three black men totally naked sitting on a park bench. Two...
23:04 Sat 21st Apr 20128 answers, last by marval 16:31 Sun 22nd Apr 2012
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maggiebee

ADVICE FROM A RETIRED HUSBAND

It is important for men to remember that, as women grow older, it becomes harder for them to maintain the same quality of housekeeping as when they were younger. When you notice this, try not to yell...
08:42 Sat 21st Apr 20126 answers, last by marval 16:06 Sun 22nd Apr 2012
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maggiebee

The Syndicate

Well folks, what did you think of last night's episode? Quite a few twists and turns. Can't believe next week is the last in the series, the characters are just great.
09:57 Wed 18th Apr 201210 answers, last by tonymclark 09:53 Fri 20th Apr 2012
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maggiebee

Remember Remember

Part 4 of The Syndicate is on at 9 pm - Yippee, loving it.
20:07 Tue 17th Apr 20125 answers, last by looobylooo 20:47 Tue 17th Apr 2012
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maggiebee

How do I?

I often see ABers sign off with a few small black hearts. How do you get them?
22:49 Sun 15th Apr 201269 answers, last by chi-chi66 19:51 Wed 25th Apr 2012
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maggiebee

Job Titles

A woman named Emily renewing her driver's license at the County Clerk's office was asked by the woman recorder to state her occupation. She hesitated, uncertain how to classify herself. "What I...
15:44 Sat 14th Apr 20127 answers, last by Wharton 22:51 Sat 14th Apr 2012
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maggiebee

Mrs O's Post re Horrible Easter

Just to balance things out a little, I think I am a very nice MIL who has a really nasty daughter-in-law. If it wasn't for my grandchildren whom I love dearly I don't think I would ever visit. She...
15:28 Sat 14th Apr 201228 answers, last by karenmac60 17:39 Sun 15th Apr 2012
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maggiebee

New Words

My grandaughter has just informed me that I'm not consultrating! Much more descriptive than the "proper" word. Any more you can think of?
17:14 Thu 12th Apr 20127 answers, last by masma 22:31 Thu 12th Apr 2012
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maggiebee

The Syndicate

Am tempted to watch the first three episodes on the iPlayer. Have any ABers watched this and if so, would you recommend?
17:51 Wed 11th Apr 201216 answers, last by March-Hare 13:47 Sun 17th Mar 2013
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maggiebee

Any Thoughts

I'm the life of the party.....even if it lasts until 8 p.m. I'm very good at opening childproof caps...with a hammer. I'm usually interested in going home before I get to where I am going. I'm awake...
16:23 Tue 10th Apr 20128 answers, last by shooty 01:36 Wed 11th Apr 2012
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maggiebee

Vascular Dementia

Friend been diagnosed with vascular dementia. I know all symptoms, but really would like to know that if this disease reduces life expectancy?
11:58 Tue 10th Apr 20123 answers, last by maggiebee 14:28 Tue 10th Apr 2012
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maggiebee

Some One-Liners

Something old, something new, something borrowed, something cr*p! Having sex is like playing bridge. If you don't have a good partner, you'd better have a good hand. Women will never be equal to men...
22:38 Sun 08th Apr 2012
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maggiebee

Poem Of Encouragement

I Stepped on the scales...I nearly died... "ONE AT A TIME " a little voice cried, How did this happen??? How could this be??? This unsightly mass I'm ashamed to call ME!!! Waistbands get...
18:55 Sun 08th Apr 20121 answer, last by Maidup 01:14 Mon 09th Apr 2012

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