Donate SIGN UP

marval

41 to 60 of 3998

First Previous 1 2 3 4 5 6 Next Last

Avatar Image
marval

Groan

Olaf the Norseman is shopping at a supermarket when he comes across an old lady in a wheelchair, almost in tears. "What's the matter?" asks Olaf. "Oh," sobs the old lady. "I want to have a look at the...
21:33 Tue 05th May 20208 answers, last by emmie 05:31 Wed 06th May 2020
Avatar Image
marval

Failed

Dear Lucy, thank you for your letter. Unfortunately your application to join our Match-making service has been rejected. You failed question 14, What do you like best in a man?" "A knife" was not an...
10:53 Mon 04th May 20205 answers, last by 10ClarionSt 18:30 Tue 05th May 2020
Avatar Image
marval

Fred And Ginger

Fred Astaire and Ginger Rogers were dining in New York. Ginger was resplendent in a ball gown and pearls, and Fred also sported evening wear. But the meal was marred when the waiter bringing their...
21:44 Thu 30th Apr 20206 answers, last by NickorWan 13:34 Fri 01st May 2020
Avatar Image
marval

Could You?

Mr. Smith comes to his wife, "Honey, could you be sewing on a wee button that's come off of my fly? I cannot button up my trousers." "Oh Dear, I have got my hands in the sink, go up the stairs and see...
16:51 Tue 28th Apr 20203 answers, last by zebo 19:54 Tue 28th Apr 2020
Avatar Image
marval

I Spotted

I spotted a lizard on a portable toilet. I suspect it was a commode-o-dragon....
12:37 Thu 23rd Apr 20202 answers, last by Chipchopper 13:46 Thu 23rd Apr 2020
Avatar Image
marval

Make Love

A woman said to her husband, “You make love like a painter.” “What like Da Vinci?” he said. “Smooth strokes, attention to detail, resulting in masterpiece?” No, she said. “Like a council painter. You...
21:36 Tue 21st Apr 20203 answers, last by marval 21:51 Tue 21st Apr 2020
Avatar Image
marval

No More Dancing

Paddy and Murphy are sat in the pub and the barmaid mentions that they are both getting a bit of a belly. They decide it is time for a bit of exercise. The barmaid says the best form of exercise is...
15:32 Sun 19th Apr 20203 answers, last by Chipchopper 08:41 Mon 20th Apr 2020
Avatar Image
marval

The Local Tennis Club

The local Tennis Club reported that their web site is down. They say they have trouble with their server. I found a Horror book written in Braille. Something bad is going to happen, I can feel it. I...
21:35 Sun 12th Apr 20204 answers, last by Patsy33 22:46 Sun 12th Apr 2020
Avatar Image
marval

Are You Lonesome?

Are you lonesome tonight, is your bra-strap too tight, are your corsets just drifting apart, have you got a big chest making holes in your vest, does your spare tyre reach out into the night, are your...
18:38 Sun 12th Apr 20203 answers, last by marval 21:06 Sun 12th Apr 2020
Avatar Image
marval

Hand Cuffs

Jill and Pamela meet up for a coffee. Jill says, "When I got home last night hubby give me a pair of hand cuffs." He then said “tie me to the bed and do whatever you want.” “What did you do?”asked...
17:45 Sat 11th Apr 20203 answers, last by Patsy33 18:22 Sat 11th Apr 2020
Avatar Image
marval

The Spot

The story is told of a pastor who designated an area of ground just below his kitchen window as “the spot.” When a well-meaning church member gave him, a less than savoury casserole. He would simply...
10:54 Fri 10th Apr 20201 answer, last by Patsy33 12:12 Fri 10th Apr 2020
Avatar Image
marval

Can You?

For months Billy had been Olivia's devoted admirer. At long last he had collected sufficient courage to ask her the momentous question. "There are quite a lot of advantages to being a bachelor," he...
15:04 Thu 09th Apr 20201 answer, last by Patsy33 17:04 Thu 09th Apr 2020
Avatar Image
marval

Trying

I have been trying to buy a toaster off the internet. Every single one that arrived was faulty. It turns out my web browser had disabled pop-ups....
21:13 Tue 07th Apr 20203 answers, last by Patsy33 11:31 Wed 08th Apr 2020
Avatar Image
marval

Raided

A house in our street got raided by the police. They stormed in and arrested three guys. They said they were caught smoking amattabooboo. I hear you all asking. "What's amattabooboo?" Nothing Yogi...
17:59 Tue 07th Apr 20202 answers, last by Patsy33 18:11 Tue 07th Apr 2020
Avatar Image
marval

How Far Would You Go?

I have just read this story, I think it would have cost more than buying at home....
14:06 Tue 07th Apr 20208 answers, last by Unsureme 17:19 Tue 07th Apr 2020
Avatar Image
marval

Come Back

A plumber was called to a woman’s flat to repair a leaking pipe. When he arrived he was pleased to discover that the woman was quite a luscious, well-stacked lady, and during the course of the...
15:46 Sun 05th Apr 20205 answers, last by retrocop 23:48 Sun 05th Apr 2020
Avatar Image
marval

Oops

A husband wrote a message to his wife on his official trip and didn’t realise he was missing an ‘e’ at the end of a word. “I am having such a wonderful time! Wish you were her.” In reply, she sent the...
21:21 Sat 04th Apr 20203 answers, last by Patsy33 21:44 Sat 04th Apr 2020
Avatar Image
marval

I Am

I am in witness protection. I sell condoms to Jehovah's....
17:09 Thu 02nd Apr 20202 answers, last by retrocop 17:21 Thu 02nd Apr 2020
Avatar Image
marval

Welcome

"Welcome to the improve your patience helpline. You are currently in a queue and are in position 26" "Please hold."...
17:24 Tue 31st Mar 20203 answers, last by zebo 13:56 Wed 01st Apr 2020
Avatar Image
marval

Salons

Nail salons, hair salons, waxing centres, and tanning salons are closed. It is about to get ugly out there....
16:00 Mon 30th Mar 202017 answers, last by NickorWan 08:46 Tue 31st Mar 2020

41 to 60 of 3998

First Previous 1 2 3 4 5 6 Next Last