I've just got back from holiday.
The hotel we stopped at was absolutely fantastic.
The towels were so soft and fluffy, I could hardly close my suitcase....
Applying for a new position as a cleaning lady, the woman was asked why she had left her previous job. "I just wasn't comfortable with their immoral behavior," she replied. "Really? Like what did they...
Paddy and Mick arrive at the local Rugby match and Mick can't find the tickets. Mick says "Nip home Paddy and see if I left the tickets there." Paddy says "No problem, Mick." Half an hour later Paddy...
A man came back from a long business trip to find that his son had a new £300 mountain bike. "How did you get that, son?" "By hiking." "Hiking?" "Yes, every night, Mum's boss came over and gave me...
An executive was scheduled to speak at an important convention, so he asked one of his employees to write him a punchy, 20-minute speech. When the executive returned from the big event, he was...
The pretty secretary came in late for work the third day in a row. The boss called her into his office and said. "Now look Sharon, I know we had a wild fling for a while, but that's over. I expect you...
"Doctor Sqad, you have got to help my husband," a farmer's wife said frantically. "He thinks he's a racehorse. He wants to live in a stable; he walks on all fours and he even eats hay." "I'm sure I...
A young salesman was out on business when one night he had to stop at a farm, the only room available was with the farmer’s pretty daughter. The farmer having heard this kind of joke before asked...
A man was riding on a crowded bus, standing room only. The bus stopped and an elderly lady got on carrying a large picnic basket. She stood right in front of the man and grabbed the overhead rail so...
Ole and Lena went to the same Lutheran Church. Lena went every Sunday and taught Sunday School. Ole went on Christmas and Easter and once in awhile he went on one of the other Sundays. On one of those...
A married were couple sleeping when an intruder entered into their house. The intruder put a knife to the neck of the woman and said, "I like to know the names of my victims before I kill them, what...
Two guys are driving through Texas when they get pulled over by a state trooper. The trooper walks up, taps on the window with his nightstick, the driver rolls down the window, and the trooper smacks...
A man is sitting next to a woman who's trying to breast-feed her baby on a bus. The baby refuses to suck the breast and the mother warns, "If you don't suck, I shall give it to the uncle next to me."...
Bicycles don't get pregnant. You can ride your Bicycle any time of the month. Bicycles don't have parents. Bicycles don't whine unless something is really wrong. You can share your Bicycle with your...
A bad CV I think. NAME: Armando Rodriguez. DESIRED POSITION Reclining. Ha ha ha. But seriously, whatever's available. If I was in a position to be picky, I wouldn't be applying here in the first...
An Airline starts a new concept of having a chef on Board the plane. This demanding passenger walks up the aisle and tells the hostess, "Let me get a cheeseburger, not too rare, not too well done, but...
Element Name: MAN Symbol: XY Atomic Weight: (180+/-50) Physical properties: Solid at room temperature, but gets bent out of shape easily. Fairly dense and sometimes flaky. Difficult to find a pure...
