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marval

1501 to 1520 of 3998

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marval

Taste

One day Paddy, an Irishman, goes into a pharmacy, reaches into his pocket and takes out a small Irish whiskey bottle and a teaspoon. He pours some liquid onto the teaspoon and offers it to the...
18:06 Fri 19th Dec 20146 answers, last by janbee 05:18 Sat 20th Dec 2014
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marval

And I Am Sober

Prinderella and the Cince This is a stairy fory. Tonce upon a wime there was a gritty little pearl named Prinderella. She lived with her two sisty uglers and her nicked wepstother. She weaned the...
16:23 Thu 18th Dec 20147 answers, last by Bazile 12:33 Mon 22nd Dec 2014
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marval

My Partner

My partner made me join a bridge club. I jump off next Tuesday....
15:36 Thu 18th Dec 201415 answers, last by marval 16:32 Thu 18th Dec 2014
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marval

I Drink

I drink while I work out I call it Bacardio...
18:08 Wed 17th Dec 20144 answers, last by frugalfred 18:17 Wed 17th Dec 2014
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marval

Message For All The Gents

The management of Answerbank Towers have asked me to point out that the sign in the gents ‘Wet Floor,’ is a warning not an instruction....
22:43 Tue 16th Dec 20145 answers, last by Zacs-Master 22:55 Tue 16th Dec 2014
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marval

When?

A man walks into a university bar and asks the bar man. "When do you finish serving?" The bar man replies. "When I get to the g"...
21:49 Tue 16th Dec 20141 answer, last by Tilly2 21:54 Tue 16th Dec 2014
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marval

A Warning

When milking a nervous goat Kid gloves should be used...
13:57 Sun 14th Dec 20141 answer, last by frugalfred 21:56 Mon 15th Dec 2014
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marval

I Wanted

I wanted to become a plumber But that's just a pipe dream...
13:12 Sun 14th Dec 20149 answers, last by carrust 23:21 Sun 14th Dec 2014
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marval

I'd Like

The maitre d' of a fashionable restaurant looked up and saw three little girls standing in the waiting area. They were dressed in their mother's clothes, had on high-heeled shoes and were wearing lots...
22:49 Wed 10th Dec 20142 answers, last by tonyav 22:58 Fri 12th Dec 2014
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marval

French Logic

One night in Paris, an American tourist dropped into a side street cafe late at night and, after a couple of drinks, realised he was the last person in the bar except for a man sleeping at one of the...
22:37 Wed 10th Dec 20141 answer, last by craft1948 22:41 Wed 10th Dec 2014
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marval

I'm Going To Buy

I'm going to buy some Velcro for my shoes instead of laces. Why knot? I don't trust people with graph paper. They're always plotting something. Smaller babies may be delivered by stork but the heavier...
18:03 Wed 10th Dec 2014
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marval

I Can

I can hear music coming out of my printer. I think the paper's jammin' again....
16:12 Wed 10th Dec 20147 answers, last by DTCwordfan 20:41 Wed 10th Dec 2014
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marval

Oops Careful What You Say

Harry was not only the boss, he was a serious practical joker, who was always playing embarrassing tricks on his staff. Then came the day of the Office Christmas Dinner, which seemed like a good...
17:06 Sun 07th Dec 201411 answers, last by Psybbo 22:16 Mon 08th Dec 2014
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marval

Even Animals Have Standards

A politician and two friends, a Rabbi and a Hindu holy man, had car trouble in the countryside and asked to spend the night with a farmer. The farmer said "There might be a problem; you see, I only...
19:42 Fri 05th Dec 2014
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marval

Dog

This dog, is dog, a dog, good dog, way dog, to dog, keep dog, an dog, idiot dog, busy dog, for dog, 20 dog, seconds dog! Now read without the word dog....
22:19 Tue 02nd Dec 20147 answers, last by tonyav 18:46 Wed 03rd Dec 2014
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marval

Tony's Musical Instrument

Tony walked into a shop, which sold musical instruments and bought a very expensive mouth organ. As Bernie the shopkeeper wrapped up the instrument he said, "You know this this is quite amazing. We...
19:08 Sun 30th Nov 20142 answers, last by DTCwordfan 19:11 Sun 30th Nov 2014
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marval

What's That?

Two eggs sitting on a kitchen table One of them spots a whisk and asks "what's that?" The other egg looks puzzled and replies "beats me."...
18:33 Sun 30th Nov 20147 answers, last by marval 18:44 Sun 30th Nov 2014
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marval

Driving

Driving to work, a man had to swerve to avoid a box that fell out of a van in front of him. Seconds later, a policeman pulled him over for reckless driving. Fortunately, another officer had seen the...
11:38 Sun 30th Nov 201414 answers, last by DTCwordfan 19:59 Sun 30th Nov 2014
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marval

Need?

After booking her ninety year-old mother on a flight from Florida to Nevada, a woman called the airline to go over her needs. The woman representative listened patiently as she requested a wheelchair...
17:44 Sat 29th Nov 20141 answer, last by frugalfred 17:37 Sun 30th Nov 2014
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marval

Shopping

A six-year-old ran up and down the supermarket aisles shouting frantically: "Marian, Marian!" Finally reunited with his mother, he was chided by her. "You shouldn't call me 'Marian.' I'm your mother."...
22:48 Fri 28th Nov 20143 answers, last by excelsior-1 03:47 Sat 29th Nov 2014

1501 to 1520 of 3998

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