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marval

Called

So I called up the spiritual leader of Tibet, and he sent me a large goat with a long neck. Turns out I phoned dial-a-llama....
14:27 Tue 01st Apr 20142 answers, last by lady-janine 14:31 Tue 01st Apr 2014
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marval

Weight

A woman and her mother were discussing their mutual weight problem one evening, when the daughter challenged her to a contest. If she lost the most weight in the next month, she wouldn’t have to pay...
14:05 Tue 01st Apr 2014
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marval

Complaints

Think its easy being a landlord? Check out these tenant complaints: “The toilet is blocked, and we cannot bathe the children until it is cleared.” “Fifty percent of the walls are damp, 50...
22:05 Mon 31st Mar 20145 answers, last by cisternfittingsu 10:46 Tue 24th Jun 2014
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Are You Listening To Me?

At a clearance sale, the wife of a federal district-court judge found the perfect green tie to match one of her husband’s sport jackets. Soon after, while the couple was relaxing at a resort complex...
16:43 Mon 31st Mar 20142 answers, last by weecalf 18:24 Mon 31st Mar 2014
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marval

Noisy Husband

The wheel of my shopping trolley was making a horrible scraping sound as I pushed it through the supermarket. Nevertheless, when I finished my shopping and saw a woman without one, I offered it up,...
21:51 Sun 30th Mar 2014
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marval

It's Okay

A woman and her husband had been trying to have a third child for a while. Unfortunately, the day she was to take a home pregnancy test, he was called out of town on business. She had told their young...
17:42 Sun 30th Mar 20141 answer, last by excelsior-1 17:44 Sun 30th Mar 2014
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marval

Scare

As a man stepped out of the shower, he heard someone in the kitchen downstairs. Knowing that his wife was out, he grabbed his 1903 heirloom rifle—which no longer worked, and crept downstairs,...
15:54 Sun 30th Mar 20144 answers, last by excelsior-1 18:05 Sun 30th Mar 2014
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marval

I Want

A 70-year-old man sat down in the orthopedic surgeon's office. "You know, Doctor," he said, "I've made love in more exotic cars than anyone I know. Must be at least a thousand." "And now, I suppose,...
13:43 Sun 30th Mar 20141 answer, last by albaqwerty 13:45 Sun 30th Mar 2014
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marval

Dear Son

Dear Son, I'm writing this slow 'cause I know you can't read fast. We don't live where we did when you left. Your dad read in the paper that most accidents happen within twenty miles of home, so we...
12:08 Sun 30th Mar 20146 answers, last by zebo 09:36 Mon 31st Mar 2014
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marval

Hold

A bartender in a gay bar was getting ready to close for the night when a robber with a ski mask burst in and pulls a gun. He yells to the bartender, "This is a stick-up! Put all your dough in this...
17:43 Fri 28th Mar 20143 answers, last by roger 02:51 Mon 31st Mar 2014
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marval

Oh Dear

Patrick and Mary, being good Irish Catholics, had so many children that they didn't know what to do. Patrick says to Mary, "I think we need to get some advice from the parish priest. We can't keep on...
17:16 Tue 25th Mar 20144 answers, last by cupid04 15:14 Wed 26th Mar 2014
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marval

Just A Few

It was an emotional wedding Even the cake was in tiers. So this guy with a premature ejaculation problem comes out of nowhere. A magician was walking down the street and turned into a grocery store....
15:06 Sun 23rd Mar 20145 answers, last by frugalfred 17:30 Sun 23rd Mar 2014
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marval

School

The college professor was trying to demonstrate a project on his computer to four students helping him edit a newsletter. He was having problems with the computer, so the ladies went over to the...
17:37 Sat 22nd Mar 20141 answer, last by maggiebee 23:00 Sat 22nd Mar 2014
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marval

Is This B00?

A baker is just getting ready to lock his front door when a woman rushes up. "I need to have a cake made right now!" she exclaims. "I'm sorry," replies the baker. "But I was just closing up. I've...
16:00 Fri 21st Mar 201412 answers, last by Jordyboy9 18:20 Fri 21st Aug 2015
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marval

It's The Law

A man who had never been in a court of law before was put on the stand as a witness. The court stenographer recorded every word he said. The man started to talk faster. The stenographer's fingers flew...
22:23 Thu 20th Mar 20144 answers, last by pixie373 10:36 Fri 21st Mar 2014
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What Is In A Name

A Jewish father, Moishe, got a call from his eldest son, Yitzak, who told him, "Father, I am going to marry!" Moishe actually danced with joy. "Tell me, is she a good Jewish girl? What's her name?"...
12:58 Wed 19th Mar 20142 answers, last by mikey4444 12:05 Thu 20th Mar 2014
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marval

Beautiful Night

On his honeymoon, a very thick redneck farmer, Billy Joe, insisted on having a room at the luxury hotel with a balcony overlooking the sea. On retiring for the night after the wedding, his new bride...
15:54 Tue 18th Mar 20142 answers, last by marval 16:00 Tue 18th Mar 2014
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marval

Proud

The minister had just finished an excellent chicken dinner at the home of a member of his congregation when he saw a rooster come strutting through the yard. "That's certainly a proud-looking rooster...
22:40 Mon 17th Mar 20142 answers, last by Jordyboy9 16:20 Thu 20th Mar 2014
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marval

For St.patrick's Day.

Paddy,” says Mary, “if you were stranded on a desert island who would you like most to be with you?” "My uncle Mick"replies Paddy. "What’s so special about him?" asks Mary. "He’s got a...
15:31 Mon 17th Mar 20141 answer, last by albaqwerty 15:34 Mon 17th Mar 2014
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marval

The Doctor's Drink

A doctor made it his regular habit to stop off at a bar for a hazelnut daiquiri on his way home. The bartender knew of his habit, and would always have the drink waiting at precisely 5:03 p.m. One...
23:37 Sun 16th Mar 20145 answers, last by marval 14:33 Mon 17th Mar 2014

1841 to 1860 of 3998

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