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marval

1941 to 1960 of 3998

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marval

Thank You Les Dawson

I wouldn't say the room was small but when I talked to myself, one of us had to step outside to reply. I said to the wife, 'I wish you wouldn't smoke in bed.' She said, 'But a lot of women do.' I...
17:46 Mon 13th Jan 20149 answers, last by shoota 23:32 Mon 13th Jan 2014
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marval

What Did You Lose?

A woman who plays cards once a month with a group of friends was concerned that she always woke her husband when she came home around 11:30 PM. One night she decided to try not to rouse him. She...
19:53 Sun 12th Jan 20144 answers, last by cupid04 20:03 Sun 12th Jan 2014
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marval

I'll Bet

"I'll bet you have to think twice before you leave your wife alone at night." one man said to the other. "I'll say." replied the second, "First, I have to think up a reason for going out. Second, I...
15:11 Sat 11th Jan 20142 answers, last by Fanriffic 16:06 Sun 12th Jan 2014
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marval

Knock Knock

As an ultimate test of his will power, a man decided to give up sex while he dieted to loose a stone. Although not thrilled with the idea, his wife agreed to support him in this effort. The first few...
23:48 Fri 10th Jan 20142 answers, last by pixie373 09:49 Sat 11th Jan 2014
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marval

What Are The...

What are the small rivers that run into the Nile? The juve-niles! What's the difference between a genealogist and a gynaecologist? One looks up the family tree, the other looks up the family bush. Why...
22:36 Fri 10th Jan 20142 answers, last by smartowl 11:45 Sat 11th Jan 2014
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marval

Romance

He: “Would you like to dance?” She: “Not with you.” He: “Oh, come on; lower your standards a little. I did.” A woman gets up, opens the curtains, takes the cover off the parrot's cage,...
20:09 Thu 09th Jan 20143 answers, last by berniecuddles 20:13 Thu 09th Jan 2014
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marval

Delivery

Two storks are sitting in their nest, a father stork and his son. The son is asking his father where his mother went. "Don't worry, son. Your mother will come back. She's only bringing people babies...
15:52 Wed 08th Jan 20144 answers, last by frozengal 06:25 Thu 09th Jan 2014
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marval

Law

An old man was a witness in a burglary trial. The defence lawyer asks Sam, "Did you see my client commit this burglary?" "Yes," said Sam, "I saw him plainly take the goods." The lawyer asks Sam again,...
22:54 Tue 07th Jan 20145 answers, last by matthiasbriggs 16:51 Mon 20th Jan 2014
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marval

Have A Laugh

A minister was opening his mail one morning. He took out a single sheet of paper from an envelope; on it he found written only one word: "FOOL." The next Sunday he announced, "I have known many people...
17:33 Mon 06th Jan 20143 answers, last by frozengal 07:33 Tue 07th Jan 2014
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marval

Naughty Johnny

"Dad," said Little Johnny, "I'm late for football practice. Would you please do my homework for me?" The father said irately, "Son, it just wouldn't be right." "That's okay," replied Little Johnny,...
19:01 Sun 05th Jan 20144 answers, last by starone 21:30 Sun 05th Jan 2014
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marval

Short And Sweet Two

We just paid for a survey for our house, 8 out of 10 people said they’d buy it. I was always taking notes at my last job, But then they checked the till. I purchased a microwave bed recently, 8...
23:31 Sat 04th Jan 20143 answers, last by starone 16:35 Sun 05th Jan 2014
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marval

Short And Sweet

As I was walking down the street, I noted a man with a large pole in his hand and stopped to ask, "Are you a pole-vaulter?" His response was, "No, I'm German, but how did you know my name was Walter?"...
18:14 Sat 04th Jan 20144 answers, last by pixie373 18:41 Sun 05th Jan 2014
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marval

School

The kindergarten class had settled down to its colouring books. Willie came up to the teacher's desk and said, "Miss Francis, I ain't got no crayons.” "Willie," Miss Francis said, "you mean, "I...
20:52 Fri 03rd Jan 20142 answers, last by zebo 06:35 Sat 04th Jan 2014
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marval

Hold That Train

Three professors had walked down to the train station from the University. They were so absorbed in their conversation that they didn't hear the train arrive, but they did notice the noise of the...
18:16 Fri 03rd Jan 20145 answers, last by starone 21:04 Fri 03rd Jan 2014
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marval

Police

A woman who was driving down the motorway pulled over to the side of the road when the policeman driving behind her turned on his lights and siren. She didn't have her seat belt on so as soon as she...
23:49 Thu 02nd Jan 20143 answers, last by starone 16:25 Fri 03rd Jan 2014
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marval

The Month After Christmas

Twas the month after Christmas, and all through the house Nothing would fit me, not even a blouse. The cookies I'd nibbled, the eggnog I'd taste At the holiday parties had gone to my waist. When I got...
19:59 Mon 30th Dec 20132 answers, last by starone 12:29 Wed 01st Jan 2014
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marval

Family

When a customer left his mobile phone in a shop, the assistant scrolled through his saved numbers. When they found ”Mum” they stopped and pushed the dial button. His mother answered, and they told...
18:34 Mon 30th Dec 20131 answer, last by puddle-duck 23:47 Mon 30th Dec 2013
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marval

New Years Eve One Liners

A New Year’s resolution is something that goes in one year and out the other. My new year’s resolution is to be more optimistic by keeping my cup half-full with Rum, Vodka, or Whiskey. New Years...
14:29 Sun 29th Dec 20136 answers, last by puternut 09:20 Mon 30th Dec 2013
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marval

Groan

Once upon a time there was a little girl who wanted a kitten for Christmas. Now, her mother couldn't buy a kitten and parcel it up for Christmas Day, so she bought it a week before Christmas and gave...
21:32 Sat 28th Dec 20136 answers, last by tonyav 21:38 Sat 28th Dec 2013
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marval

No Returns

A Quality Engineer married an average girl. After 24 months of tough life with her, finally the Engineer got angry and sent a note to his father-in-law stating that: 'YOUR PRODUCT IS NOT MEETING MY...
19:06 Sat 28th Dec 20131 answer, last by starone 21:59 Sat 28th Dec 2013

1941 to 1960 of 3998

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