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marval

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MalcolmY

A Roman legion was on the march...

...left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right,...
11:10 Mon 18th May 20093 answers, last by Parsfan 13:41 Tue 19th May 2009
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daffy654

Britains's Oldest Mum-To-Be

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk/8054142.stm What age should women stop having children? I think this woman is being very selfish and has only considered her wants and needs,not those of the child she is...
10:57 Sun 17th May 200917 answers, last by mamasaurus 23:12 Mon 18th May 2009
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carsonking

Two Paddys go for a job

Two Paddy's go for a job on a building site, Sean goes in first and the boss says, 'give me a sentence with the word 'great' in it and you have got the job', Sean says 'i've got a new donkey jacket...
11:58 Sun 17th May 20092 answers, last by Quizmonkey 02:45 Wed 20th May 2009
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sindiap

devices

Heraldic device, originally used to identify government property (5,5)
11:41 Sun 17th May 20092 answers, last by marval 12:01 Sun 17th May 2009
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scakebread

Teddy bears

A teddy bear applied for a job as a navvy. He got the job and the supervisor gave him a shovel and a pickaxe and showed him where to dig the trench. All went well until the teddy bear returned to work...
20:44 Sat 16th May 20094 answers, last by poodicat 13:58 Sun 17th May 2009
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placey84

Can any find this record/CD??

Hi, I remember hearing a song a few years back 5 in fact. Its a white label and i cant get a copy of it any where!! Ive tried Hardtofindrecords.com an they haven't had it in stock since Dec 2003!!...
01:47 Sat 16th May 20094 answers, last by placey84 15:24 Sat 16th May 2009
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lindylou16

Hee Hee Ha Ha

My boss is getting pretty ****** off with me. Whenever I see a Fire Exit I can't help myself, I dash out and then stand by the designated Fire Assembly Point. I suffer from premature evacuation.
12:41 Sat 16th May 20091 answer, last by marval 15:14 Sat 16th May 2009
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darren197373

Bloke in hospital

with 60% burns,Dr says "give him 2 Viagra".Nurse asks "do you think that'll help?"Dr replies "no but it'll keep the sheets off his legs.
14:54 Sat 16th May 20093 answers, last by McMouse 15:59 Sat 16th May 2009
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daneswalk

rubbish

lets get back to someone saying some nice things about the the people on here and stop the bickering i only came on to say good evening all to find this nonsense going on no wonder people are leaving
22:54 Fri 15th May 20096 answers, last by Tallulah! 09:19 Sat 16th May 2009
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lindylou16

Ho Ho Ho

When this bloke asked me if i preffered legs, thighs or breasts, i told him that i had a fondness for shaved fannies. He then told me that this wasnt an option with the KFC Bargin Bucket.......
20:26 Fri 15th May 20093 answers, last by albaqwerty 22:58 Fri 15th May 2009
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lindylou16

Hee Hee

Paddy goes into superdrug & asks for KY jelly. The assistant says, we haven't got any have you tried Boots? Paddy says, I want to slide in, not march in!!
20:18 Fri 15th May 20092 answers, last by lindylou16 12:38 Sat 16th May 2009
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rach4385

Song needed

I need to find a happy song for a high soprano who is 18 years old. The song doesnt want to be too soppy or cheesy! If you can help THANK YOU!!!
15:21 Fri 15th May 20092 answers, last by marval 16:50 Fri 15th May 2009
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Oneeyedvic

Great news which should be on the front of every newspaper today

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/tyne/804972 9.stm A Northumberland millionaire is selling his ?16m country estate and giving every penny of the proceeds to charity. Brian Burnie is open to offers...
11:27 Fri 15th May 20099 answers, last by Simon-Bloom 08:08 Tue 19th May 2009
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nix-j-c

eurovision a farse?

there are a few countries that pay to organise eurovision and they get to the finals straight away. plus the judging is diferent to how it used to be. its become a great big farse. who agrees?
19:29 Wed 13th May 200912 answers, last by sue11 15:18 Mon 25th May 2009
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BockingBob

A Tortoise.

Did you hear about the tortoise who got mugged by a gang of snails. When asked by the police if he would recognize any of the muggers again he replied "No it all happened so fast ".
09:10 Fri 15th May 20091 answer, last by marval 11:41 Fri 15th May 2009
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McMouse

bee sting

A young woman had been taking golf lessons. She had just started playing her first round of golf When she suffered a bee sting. Her pain was so intense that she decided to return To the clubhouse for...
12:06 Thu 14th May 20091 answer, last by marval 20:12 Thu 14th May 2009
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HJT40

Wedding Guests - How much is reasonable?

I am getting married in 11 weeks (yipee!). The invites were sent out in plenty of time, due to school summer holidays, we are getting married in a registry office near where we live and the reception...
12:49 Thu 14th May 200917 answers, last by kira000 20:46 Fri 15th May 2009
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marval

Three Pregnant Women

Three pregnant women were sitting in a Gynaecologist's waiting room (of course, one was blonde, one was a redhead and one was a brunette). The brunette proudly says, "I'm going to have a son 'coz my...
14:27 Tue 12th May 20094 answers, last by tamborine 23:35 Wed 13th May 2009
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darren197373

My missus has just gone into hospital

with two black eyes and a broken jaw.It seems we were on different wavelengths when she said she wanted decking on the patio.
18:57 Wed 13th May 20097 answers, last by marval 22:43 Wed 13th May 2009
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hollie1586

Beyonce 'I Am...' tour

does anyone know who the support acts are for Beyonce's uk tour?? im going to see the tour in june at the sheffield arena.
15:59 Wed 13th May 200913 answers, last by yogi.bear 16:39 Wed 13th May 2009

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