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Rondy

1701 to 1720 of 2559

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Rondy

Licence Application

A Polish immigrant went to the DMV to apply for a driver's licence. First, of course, he had to take an eye sight test. The optician showed him a card with the letters: 'C Z W I X N O S T A C Z.' "Can...
09:20 Sun 06th Feb 2022
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Rondy

Drunk

A serious drunk walked into a bar and, after staring for some time at the only woman seated at the bar, walked over to her and kissed her. She jumped up and slapped him silly. He immediately...
18:48 Sat 05th Feb 20221 answer, last by sanmac 18:52 Sat 05th Feb 2022
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Rondy

Speeding

I definitely learned my lesson about speeding today and it will never happen again. I didn't get pulled over or anything... I just showed up to work 20 minutes early....
15:21 Sat 05th Feb 2022
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Rondy

Visitor

A little boy greeted his grandmother with a hug and said, "I'm so happy to see you, Grandma. Now maybe Daddy will do the trick he has been promising us." The grandmother was curious. "What trick is...
12:38 Sat 05th Feb 20221 answer, last by Bazile 12:56 Sat 05th Feb 2022
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Rondy

And Some More

My teeth were stained, so the dentist asked me, “do you smoke or drink coffee?” I told him I usually drink it. ___________ I'm going to try Velcro instead of shoes laces… I mean, why knot? ___________...
18:49 Fri 04th Feb 20221 answer, last by Patsy33 18:51 Fri 04th Feb 2022
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Rondy

Winter Olympics

The Irish Bobsleigh team at the Winter Olympics are refusing to race until the course has been gritted! ___________ Sick and tired of hearing these winter Olympic athletes say how much work they've...
15:35 Fri 04th Feb 2022
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Rondy

Visitors

I visited my new friend in his apartment. He told me to make myself at home. So I threw him out, I hate visitors. ___________ A barhopping fellow, four sheets to the wind, stumbles into a bar and...
15:32 Fri 04th Feb 20221 answer, last by Ken4155 15:35 Fri 04th Feb 2022
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Rondy

Thirsty Work

A traveller was stumbling through the desert, desperate for water, when he saw something far off in the distance. Hoping to find water, he walked towards the image, only to find a little old peddler...
16:03 Thu 03rd Feb 20221 answer, last by Ken4155 16:07 Thu 03rd Feb 2022
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Rondy

Olympics

At the Olympic games a man went up to a competitor who was carrying a very long pole. "Are you a pole vaulter?" "No, I'm German, but how did you know my name is Walter?"...
12:33 Thu 03rd Feb 20222 answers, last by Patsy33 12:44 Thu 03rd Feb 2022
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Rondy

Cowboys

When growing up as a kid all I wanted was a cowboy outfit... Now I work for one......
20:48 Wed 02nd Feb 20223 answers, last by melv16 14:13 Thu 03rd Feb 2022
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Rondy

Explorer

A young reporter went to a retirement home to interview an aged but legendary explorer. The reporter asked the old man to tell him the most frightening experience he had ever had. The old explorer...
16:59 Wed 02nd Feb 20221 answer, last by brian j john 18:29 Wed 02nd Feb 2022
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Rondy

Accident

This blonde runs off the road in her BMW into a tree bumping her head getting a slight concussion. All of a sudden she yells out, "Help! I can't see! Please Help me I am blind! Help!" This paramedic...
15:32 Wed 02nd Feb 20222 answers, last by maggiebee 15:52 Wed 02nd Feb 2022
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Rondy

Want Some More?

Took my girlfriend to an orchard in Somerset for her birthday. Turns out that wasn’t the apple watch she’d wanted. ______________ Whenever I play golf, I always take two pairs of trousers. Just in...
19:50 Tue 01st Feb 20223 answers, last by zebo 12:12 Wed 02nd Feb 2022
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Rondy

Onions?

Just want to let everyone know I am in hospital and they are keeping me in, I have only poisoned myself, what I thought was an onion turned out to be a daffodil bulb. They said I should be out...
18:46 Tue 01st Feb 20223 answers, last by DTCwordfan 23:23 Tue 01st Feb 2022
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Rondy

Marriage Conversation

Conversation between husband and wife: ----------------------------------------------------- WIFE: "What would you do if I died? Would you get married again?" HUSBAND: "Definitely not!" WIFE: "Why not...
14:12 Tue 01st Feb 20222 answers, last by Bazile 14:17 Tue 01st Feb 2022
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Rondy

The Dentist

A man and his wife entered a dentist's office. The wife said, "I want a tooth pulled. I don't want gas or Novocain because I'm in a terrible hurry. Just pull the tooth as quickly as possible." "You're...
13:33 Tue 01st Feb 20225 answers, last by Bazile 14:10 Tue 01st Feb 2022
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Rondy

And More

My dad used to let me put my pocket money in a special box under the stairs...... I was fifteen when I found out it was the gas meter. ______________ I've just opened a new account at the Bank of...
20:47 Mon 31st Jan 20221 answer, last by Patsy33 13:49 Tue 01st Feb 2022
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Rondy

Mr Chang

Mr Chang moved to a small estate in Ireland, only problem was that there were no Chinese restaurants there so he was forced to eat at Paddy's cafe. Chang's favourite food was fried rice and Paddy...
15:23 Mon 31st Jan 2022
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Rondy

Quasimodo

Quasimodo is running down the street being chased by a crowd of kids. "*** off!" Shouts Quasimodo. "I'm not hiding your bloody football."...
13:49 Mon 31st Jan 20221 answer, last by Patsy33 17:33 Mon 31st Jan 2022

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