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velvet lady

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velvet lady

does anyone really care if.......

do u really care who sings in wot ad? are we that sad to care who sings in the fiesta advert? or which man played the part in the baked beans advert? do you need some extra mental health help? or get...
17:30 Sat 25th Oct 20089 answers, last by Disco Fever 07:26 Mon 27th Oct 2008
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sara3

Tuesday jokey...

some idiot keeps ringing me and singing "Prince Charming" and "Stand and Deliver" down the phone. I keep telling him to f*** off, but he's adamant.
21:55 Tue 21st Oct 20087 answers, last by sara3 18:07 Sat 25th Oct 2008
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wildwood

A 3-year-old boy

was examined his testicles while taking a bath. 'Mum' , he asked , 'Are these my brains?' 'Not yet , ' she replied.
05:49 Sat 18th Oct 20083 answers, last by velvet lady 18:00 Sat 25th Oct 2008
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Mr k

Women on a night out

Two women on their way home from a night out stop in a graveyard for a wee. One wipes her bottom with her knickers but the other uses a discarded wreath. Their two husbands were in the pub the next...
18:23 Sat 18th Oct 20083 answers, last by velvet lady 17:59 Sat 25th Oct 2008
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SIRandyraven

Most money you have ever lost ?

Whats the most money you have ever lost ? I put ?50 on a horse once and lost the lot. Gordon Brown , invested ?27,000,000,000 in Bank shares two weeks ago and so far has lost 25% of his gamble.
16:05 Sat 25th Oct 200815 answers, last by dustypuss 19:01 Sat 25th Oct 2008
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hangingbrain

Hello

so had a date last night with this broad and everything went well and she was wild in the sack. however i invited her around tonight and she drank loads of vodka, got really drunk, started crying...
16:37 Sat 25th Oct 200856 answers, last by sir.knobby 19:08 Sat 25th Oct 2008
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Segilla

Parboling potatoes before roasting

In the interests of economy, can anyone give a good reason why potatoes should be brought to the boil before putting them in the oven for roasting. Seems a waste of water and fuel since the oven will...
17:09 Sat 25th Oct 200817 answers, last by angiebaby57 10:53 Thu 11th Dec 2008
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wendilla

Dish Washers

I haven't got room for a large dishwasher.Have been looking at the table top one in the Argos book. page 608 Does this work off the taps from sink or has it got to be plumbed in .It says cold water...
16:51 Sat 25th Oct 200813 answers, last by wendilla 09:46 Mon 27th Oct 2008
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joggerjayne

more mistaken identity

Jesus is strolling through Heaven when he meets an old man, who seems to be searching for something. "Have you lost something?" asks Jesus. "I'm looking for my son, who I haven't seen for many years"...
11:07 Thu 23rd Oct 20084 answers, last by velvet lady 16:55 Sat 25th Oct 2008
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Seafarer1966

Pussy Galore

Paddy says to Mick: I hear the Bond girl who played Pussy Galore has split her fanny open. Micks says: Honor Blackman? Paddy says: no...on a dildo.
15:40 Fri 24th Oct 20083 answers, last by velvet lady 16:50 Sat 25th Oct 2008
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Seafarer1966

Nurses in a morgue

Three nurses in a morgue discover a dead man lying on a slab with a magnificent erection. Not wanting to miss a good chance the first nurse hitches up her tunic and rides the dead man. Then the second...
15:46 Fri 24th Oct 20084 answers, last by velvet lady 16:50 Sat 25th Oct 2008
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Seafarer1966

Annoying telephone call

Someone keeps ringing me and saying Stand and Deliver and Prince Charming down the phone at me. I've told him to ****** off but he's adamant.
15:48 Fri 24th Oct 20081 answer, last by velvet lady 16:49 Sat 25th Oct 2008
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MrLee-Gend

Names you dont hear kids called now?

Names you wouldnt calll kids or dont hear anymore. Harold , brian ,margaret ,madge ,bertie. Can you think of any names you dont hear kids gettingcalled.
10:54 Fri 30th May 200887 answers, last by annie0000 13:06 Fri 30th May 2008
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tiggerblue10

Is anybody doing a roast today?

If so, can I come round?
15:02 Sun 04th May 200836 answers, last by hau kola 16:13 Sun 04th May 2008
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banjosister

So.......if you are single................

or just generally sha**in do you ALWAYS use a condom? BB xx
22:06 Mon 21st Apr 200832 answers, last by China Doll 22:48 Mon 21st Apr 2008
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mudflap

Are you wearing...

Nice pants ?.
19:51 Mon 21st Apr 200842 answers, last by weeal 22:51 Mon 21st Apr 2008
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Velvetee

What happens to properties people die in?

Recent news of Mark Speight's finacee dying in the bath of their rented London flat made me wonder, what happens with flats where people die? Do the Landlords of these properties have to declare to...
10:50 Fri 18th Apr 20089 answers, last by velvet lady 16:52 Sun 20th Apr 2008
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bizzylizzy

Renting a house - different routes - advice needed

Hi everyone - can you help? We are currently renting in Somerset. The two of us (and our dog) are hoping to move to the Stratford upon Avon/Warwickshire area. We wrote to all the agents, keep an eye...
16:42 Sat 19th Apr 20088 answers, last by Twenty20 11:16 Mon 21st Apr 2008
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{Dakota}

Keeping the handbag safe?

Just a random wondering :0) While I was sitting in a traffic jam en route home from work, I locked my doors as my handbag was, as always, sitting on the passenger seat. How does anyone with a...
20:50 Thu 17th Apr 200830 answers, last by {Dakota} 17:03 Sun 20th Apr 2008
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banjosister

Did you know.........

That vaseline encourages hair growth. New one on me but thought you might like to know. Just in case you didn't already lol BB xx
23:04 Tue 15th Apr 200827 answers, last by velvet lady 07:49 Wed 16th Apr 2008

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