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I Saw This Bloke...

This morning, I saw this bloke with a 1.2-litre engine halfway down his arm. I said "More power to your elbow!"......

Passport Renewal....

.... My last passport expired in 1999. Can I simply renew it or is it a new application because it's almost 20 years since it was valid.

Voltage

Plastic Surgery

Remember when plastic surgery was a taboo subject? Now you mention Botox and nobody raises an eyebrow....

Bazile

The Mutt

I bought a dog off a blacksmith today. As soon as I got it home, it made a bolt for the door....

pastafreak

Virgin- No Internet

My super hub is blinking in all the right places, but my internet connection is mostly off. Has been for several hours. It says "connected to virgin, internet off"...will come on for a few...

Jahulaye

What’S The Funniest Answer To A Quiz Question You’Ve Ever Heard?

A friend texted me to say she was at a pub quiz and the question was Name a dangerous profession. Someone replied, an armed robber, LOOL...

alfie_30

WHAT TO WEAR We are going to Switzerland at the beginning of March on a train holiday. We will be visiting towns but also going up mountains via railways. Not sure how cold it will be and what sort of...

kloofnek

Boarding Passes

Mydaughter lives in Spain and has decided to book with Easyjet as it is very easy to get here with them,Bilbao to Manchester.She is not very computer savvy,so I will book them for her which is easy...

Shaglene

I Nearly Became A Doctor................

When I was young in the 1960's, I decided I wanted to a be doctor, so I took the entrance exam to go to Medical School. One of the questions asked was to rearrange the letters PNEIS into the name of...

nailit

So Hows The First Day

of 2018 gone for you? I woke up this morning planning on doing loads of things and done absolutely nothing. Start as you mean to go on :-)...

waterboatman

Good Morning Early Birds!

Sunday. Quite warm outside. I've been in the kitchen for the last two hours, doing the prep I should have done yesterday, but couldn't 'coz I was on the canal. my mate and his wife took me to dinner...

gness

Eating At Christmastime.....

....all the planning....shopping....preparing and serving is all very well.... We titivate the turkey......pamper the pork.......baste the beef.......swaddle sausages in blankets...marinate the...

Islay

What's On The Menu Today?

Currently in the oven I have walnut apple and white stilton tart, and for dinner we are having gravalax and prawn salad. What about you?...

Patsy33

Lovely Pub.

My friend took me to a lovely, quaint little pub today. I said, "I feel as though I've been here before. What's it called?" "Déjà vu" he replied.......

anotheoldgit

Why Did Lewis Hamilton Find It Necessary To Apologise To The Pc Brigade?

http://metro.co.uk/2017/12/27/lewis-hamilton-apology-nephew-video-branded-insincere-likes-tweets-pc-brigade-7186084/...

Rocktour

Private Eye Eye Crossword 65 Sunday December 24Th 2017

Last one

emmie

I Hope You Are All Doing Well And Enjoying

the break. I am having good time with the family, though the weather is horrible.\

EDDIE51

Some Surprising Things American's Don't Know?

I suspect many AB members are better at this than American's https://thoughtcatalog.com/nico-lang/2013/10/14-surprising-things-americans-dont-know-according-to-poll-numbers/...

Voltage

Christmas Cracker Jokes!

lets have your worst xmas cracker jokes ! What did Adam say the day before Christmas? "It's Christmas Eve"...

mikey4444

New December Archers File !

Tonight could be the night, when Justin makes a decision one way or the other.

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