What do you talk about?

[cameliaheartfelt]

I have been married nearly 3 years but have been with him for nearly 18 years. we don't have any kids and I'm currently only working now again doing agency work. I am very concerned that we just don't talk and I suppose never really have. I just don't know what to talk to him about and he never really talks to me first. I don't do much in the day apart from housework and although I ask him about his job, that is soon over and done with and I'm sure he doesn't want to dwell upon that after he's come home. We are doing up our house slowly so we talk about that and finances, apart from that nothing. What do you talk to your other half about if you don't have kids or a job? I'm really sad, we sit in the car and go along without saying hardly anything and the same when we go for walks.

[Mick-Talbot]

Well it's been 33 minutes now .......and not a word :0(

it must be me

[ummmm]

I ask lots of stupid questions. He's stupid enough to try and answer them :-)

[boxtops]

we talk about answerbank :-)

[China Doll]

We generally just take the mick out of each other constantly... we laugh a lot together... one thing we've never had a problem is the ability to talk absolute nonsense for definite amounts of time. Although occasionally we're also serious. Do you joke about and laugh together? That's always been really important to me that I can do that with my partner.

[firewatch]

We have been marriead 5 years this year and known each other donkeys years. We have one child and she is our source of convo her and the mutts. He has his interests and mine are home based as im the housewife. Hes been home 3 weeks and we stil find things to talk about. However, there are nights of silence when the convo runs out but we just enjoy the peace and quitex

[rowanwitch]

football, beer, food, tv, birds, the neighbours, family, our pasts, wedding plans, films we want to see... all sorts or we sit quietly and enjoy being together

[Smowball]

We go in fits and starts as well. Tell you what ive started doing though - I started buying a certain competition magazine to do with my son to help with general knowledge. Once he had gone to bed I kept on doing it and just randomly asked hubby several crossword questions, which he would then cheat and look up the answers on his ipod lol. But he does seem to like it and it does start conversations.

[chaptazbru]

We always have plenty to talk about, but we don't live together, so maybe that makes a difference ! Known him for five years.

[cazzz1975]

I have not had this problem in all the 18 years of being in a relationship, maybe he has never been much of a talker?

[DTCwordfan]

Look at the recent Divorce joke over on Jokes.....very relevant to here

[chaptazbru]

I remember on holiday in Wales once. At breakfast a family of four (two boys) were all chattering away about what to have for breakfast and it was all busy busy and then the two boys left the table and the Mum and Dad just sat there staring into space and never spoke a word to one another. Such a contrast.

[cazzz1975]

that is quite sad chapta

[chaptazbru]

I know cazzz, my thoughts exactly.

[DTCwordfan]

Maybe they had had a night in bed rabitting on and on?

[pusskin]

drives me nuts when we go for a few hours with out saying much. Him doing his thing and me doing mine. Then when I think "will read my book or something" he decides to come around me and dont stop talking!!!! I'm going --yee yee yee and not really listening most of the time and he doesnt even really notice, hahaha

[chaptazbru]

Tut tut DT ......

[DTCwordfan]

lol chapta....

[gsr600]

It nice when its quiet, I don't talk to my other half much, I try to make some conversation - sometimes quote stories in the newspaper & putting the world to rights helps,
but she rarely asks how my 12 hours out of the house have been (working)
then I go on the computer for a couple of hours & answer some random question etc - lol.
been with her since 1977 can't be much we haven't discussed in that time,
Plus - If you don't talk much then you can't argue - Hopefully.

[islasmum]

I think that I'm quite lucky as my other half can talk for England, and will chat to pretty much anyone about anything - when I first went out with him, we met in a pub and lunchtime, and were still there at 9pm talking. There's very little I can't discuss with him and he knows me better than anyone else. We share totally ridiculus jokes, and even when we row I can't keep it up for long. I look at other couples when we are out, and although some may be having a companionable silence there seem to be quite a few who just look bored or miserable with each other. We are with each other 24/7 as I'm not able to work at present, but if he isn't around I chat away to the dog, who naturally understands everything I say! I'm sorry camelia, but I can't imagine life like you describe it - was it like this when you first started seeing each other?

[islasmum]

Please forgive all the spelling mistakes!