you sat in the fire and are now surprised you are being burnt? i would concentrate on you and your education. your bf should sort out his own problems and wait for you (if he does love you and not see you as a convenient 'out' of his marriage)....possibly even living apart from you until things have cooled down and sorted out. you do not have to get your parents blessing or permission for marriage if you are over 18. if necessary (and you are living at home) you can also move out and forge your own way in the world. that is what being an adult is all about and if you can't deal with that, then maybe the relationship is doomed anyway. by the time i was 18, i had a toddler to look after, was living with my husband, went to college and worked to pay for all of this. this may sound harsh, but it is truth and the way of the world. his wife is not your concern - ignore any contact from her. your bf should also have the balls to deal with her and be the man that you want. if not, then maybe this relationship will not work, nor make you happy in the longer term. your education is most important, as you only get one go at life and you need to do it properly.