Sqad

[nailit]

I see ur about...just want to pick ur brains for a min if I may re: my mums cancer!
Had radio in her left arm, now has pain in her right arm as well. Complaining of severe back ache as well.
We know that cancer has spread in to skull and ribs but no pain there as yet.
Could cancer be in back/spine?
At mo all cancer seems to be in left side of body but pain in right arm is of concern.

TIA for any advice
(terminal bone cancer as you know)
Thanks

[Sqad]

Nailit......from what you have described and what we already know, she almost certainly has metastasis ( cancer spread) in her spinal cord which is now involving nerves to both arms....cervical spine metastasis.
Difficult times Nailit.

[nailit]

Why has she not got pain in her skull and ribs tho?
I don't get it!
And yet now has the use of her other arm debilitated (that hasn't yet been shown to have cancer)?
Its all so confusing.

[nailit]

Her McMillan nurses, Carers, and the NHS in general have been less than useful. God, Hope I don't get old!

[Sqad]

Skull and ribs...........no big nerves to invade......the skull is thick and the big nerves are inside and protected. The ribs do have a nerve below each rib, but it is not a large nerve, but can still be involved.

Now the cervical spine is a different ball game...large plexuses of nerves radiate into the arms and are of easy access to the rapidly advancing cancer.

The human body is not like a mathematical equation where all the inputs are standard, medicine is a very personal study......it doesn't always follow a well trodden path.

[nailit]

I might sound bitter here, but what the f..... are McMillan nurses for?
The last one that came out was preoccupied by my mum opening her bowels? WT F?
my mums dying and they are concerned about whether she has had a *** or not?

[nailit]

Cheers Sqad, appreciate it.
Thank you!

[Sqad]

Look Nailit......we all do the best that we can, but quite often the Grim Reaper wins............now i am not the most sympathetic or indeed emotionally involved on this site, for good reasons.
Your mum is going to die and all concerned are trying to make it as easy as possible for her. if she is constipated, it may well make her uncomfortable and needs attending to.
In this situation you need Macmillan nurses for her more than you need doctors. The majority of these nurses are totally dedicated and under appreciated.

[nailit]

//The majority of these nurses are totally dedicated and under appreciated.//
Agree entirely. Think I might be a bit to close...
Just that her 'assigned' nurse has rubbed me up the wrong way with her pomposity.
As you say, they are underappreciated. Apologies.
My heads up my arris and just trying to carry on as normal.

Thanks Sqad for info.

[Sqad]

LOL...LOL

"Just that her 'assigned' nurse has rubbed me up the wrong way with her pomposity. "

I understand, I have had some of that over the years.

[nailit]

LOL Sqad, bet you have ;-)

[Theland]

Nailit - lost for adequate words but I hope and pray you have the strength to confront your Mums illness, and hope and pray for her comfort. Best wishes.

[nailit]

Thank you Theland.
Despite our differences in R&S I appreciate an act of kindness, whether its a prayer or something practical. Its still an act of kindness and should be appreciated...
Thanks!

[pixie374]

Nailit, I can only imagine your feelings of frustration and helplessness here. As sqad says, their job is to keep her as comfortable as possible. Do ask them if you have questions, they will explain what and why xx

[nailit]

Ta Pix, was down mums yesterday when McMillan nurse came (and questioning her about her bowel movements again), said that they would be out again in a month.

[Rockrose]

Sorry you are struggling with your mother team nailit.
My fathers team is excellent, only 1 issue is that 1 of the carers was older than my stepmother and quite feeble and nearly fell with my father a few times we have requested she does not return

[nailit]

They do seem a bit obsessed with her toilet habits....
She has a tumour on her arm, cancer in her skull and ribs, and now possibly on her right arm but as long as she has been poo???

[nailit]

//quite feeble and nearly fell with my father a few times we have requested she does not return//
Whose looking after who?...…

[Calicogirl]

So sorry you and your Mum are going through this Nailit, but it's the same with my Grandfather who is also trerminally ill, his nurses are always most concerned that his bowels open normally because he's on morphine and that can, as Sqad identified, cause constipation which is really distressing (he had a bout of it, and it was almost the straw that broke the camels back, he was crying he was so pained and distressed) so you might not realise it but sometimes the smaller thing which they seem to obsess about are actually very much for your Mum's comfort and wellbeing. x

[pixie374]

Their part here is to make sure she is comfortable. Adding constipation to the mix just won't help her... and is usually easily solved. There are also signs they look for, that the body in general isn't using the food properly/ shutting down. They have their reasons xx

[Rockrose]

Exactly nailit my father actually stayed in bed all day rather than get her to move him