Chapel Of Rest

[Purist]

Has anyone here ever visited a close loved one in the chapel of rest before the funeral? How did you feel afterwards? I am in this situation now and part of me wants to say goodbye before cremation, but part of me is worried about how this experience will affect me? will it push me over the edge?

[ummmm]

Quite a few times. I'm glad I did it.

[chrissa1]

When my Mum died I went to see her in the Chapel of Rest and I was so pleased that I did. She looked lovely and peaceful and I said my goodbyes.

When my Dad died two years before my Mum, I didn’t go and have regretted it ever since.

[-SharonA-]

I saw both my parents in the chapel and I was already bereft, I am glad I still did it. It allowed me to have a final moment and say my goodbyes.

[sherrardk]

I didn’t go to see my gran or my mother and I haven’t regretted it.

[Mozz71]

The chance to say goodbye to Dad before his funeral was something I had to do, and if I hadn't, I'd still regret it now.

[MallyJ]

I chose not to see either of my parents in the chapel of rest.....and I am really pleased I didn't....no regrets at all

[jakep]

I went to spend time with my first husband in the chapel of rest.
I found it very comforting. I held his hands and talked to him, gave him a final kiss and left him two precious mementos. It helped a lot.

[Cloverjo]

I was asked if I wanted to go to see my mum in the chapel of rest. I was with her when she died (thankfully) so I didn’t feel the need.

When my grandparents died I wanted to remember them as they were alive. I think it might have freaked me out a bit.

[woofgang]

No never. I said goodbye to my Mum and Dad at the hospital after they had passed and my husband passed at home and I said goodbye to him there. What is cremated is just the husk, the spirit has travelled on.

[Electrochem]

I have seen deceased relatives in a chapel of rest. It is really a matter of choice and funeral directors are always supportive. There is a sense of peace and for some it brings closure. You can always take time out if you need to. A lot of people are scared about what they may see, but there is nothing to be afraid of. Sorry to hear of your situation.

[Tilly2]

I saw both my parents in the chapel of rest and was comforted to see them released fro their pain. It helped a great deal to see them at rest and at peace.

[ummmm]

I suppose it depends on how they died. My dad was a fraction of himself when he died (cancer) but the undertakers made him look very much like his former self. A much better image to have.

[Prudie]

I chose not to see my mother and I've never regretted it for a second. My brother wanted to but on the day the chapel advised him not to so he didn't. They can't make everyone look peaceful.

[Tilly2]

That's right Prudie. When my aunt and two uncles went to see my great uncle in the chapel of rest, they were advised not to go in and see him. They were quite upset though, especially my uncle who had not been there when he died.

[237SJ]

I didn't go to see either of my parents - I was with both of them when they died and didn't feel the need to go back. They were already gone as far as I was concerned. My cousin went to see her Mum several times and didn't regret it. Everyone is different.

[Mamyalynne]

Its very personal to the individual, go with the strongest uppermost feeling in your heart and mind - that will prove to be the right one.

[NellieMay]

I was there at both parents deaths and sat with them for a couple of hours afterwards. I made a mistake by going to see my dad in the chapel of rest. It was just not him any more. But we are all different and react differently.

[Old_Geezer]

Yes. Fine, well as fine as one can be in the circumstances.
Everyone probably reacts differently, but I think it cab be worthwhile. And you don't look back thinking you should have. But there's only one way to find out how you'll react.

[Old_Geezer]

Can

[bodeker]

I never saw my mother when she passed, I lived hundreds of miles away so did not really have much to do with arrangements.She had a closed coffin. My father who I adored had passed away a couple of weeks before he was found so was not an option .
My in laws were catholics so were more likely to have viewing before service so saw them both and they looked like they were sleeping and was happy to be able to say goodbye. A very close friend died and I went to see him in the funeral parlour about four times just to be able to talk to him and I found that a great comfort. Its a very personal thing and you have to go with your own feelings .