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MIL has been diagnosed with Vascular Dementia.
The advisor rang us yesterday to let us know and talk through the diagnosis, apparently social services will get a referral and will visit her to see what help will be needed.
As apparently she will need a lot of help. Does anyone know if this help is means tested and if it can be refused?
Thank you
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For more on marking an answer as the "Best Answer", please visit our FAQ.Yes it is means tested to begin with but then, as things get serious and she needs a lot of personal support there is some NHs funding available - that's two tiered. It's not huge at tier one - about £450 a month but with costs running at £1500+ a week for my Mater, every bit helps.
There's my book on this, 'My Mother has Alzheiner's, Am I Going Mad?', out there on any e-book site that has a lot of tips in it. As you probably know Vascular is the second largest form of dementia and often can twin up with Alzheimers to create a 'Mixed Dementia' which, technically, is what my mother has. If they/you can keep your MIL's blood pressure under control and avoid strokes and 'TICs' this can at least keep things stable, unlike Alzheimer's which is a gradual decline. Vascular moves in steps downwards with these incidents, the damage caused by the blood in the brain cells, rather than the plaquing of Alzheimer's.
Good luck, you all will need it but there are still memories and times to be had. Being prepared ahead of time seriously does help but they will still manage to surprise the family. The worse thing I found was my mother going for walkies, or sun-downing as it is known. God help you if you have a ''walkie' on your hands as this is probably the most worrying symptom of them all and, an issue with all dementia, you probably don't know yet if you have one or not.
And the social services down here were actually useful in terms of being informative with a home visit.......One thing though, they do stick their oar in if there is an incident - such as walkies that involves the police coming out or an ambulance - in my Mater's case, it was with arrhythmia attacks, again a symptom for some but not for all.
Morning Red, & DTC/barry. Sorry to hear about this Red - I must confess it's not something that I know a great deal about. Like as DTC was just trying to explain the differences between vascular dementia & Alzheimer's, it's all a minefield to me. I don't know how old your MIL is but I do hope you get any help that you need x
Morning smow, how are you. There are, apparently, over 100 dementias out there but most get grouped together.... Azheimer's acounts for about 65 percent of them, Vascular another 15 but then there's a very long tail, for example Parkinson's Dementia, Alcohol, Lewy Bodies, sports etc etc. Then there is a mass of symptoms that can play out in all sorts of combinations and at different times and that makes things harder to diagnose, what I call a Dementia Woolworths Pic&Mix in my book.
One good example is that as we age, we can lose our ability to recall names or misplace things, the infamous shampoo and worse in the fridge. This does not mean that you or a loved one has dementia. You go out in the garden, see the next door neighbour and forget their name, nope - no dementia. However being in the garden and forgetting why you are there, that's more cause for concern. Lastly, it's usually a play of two or three symptoms at least that come together.
OCD behaviour is a common one and if they have shown signs of it in their earlier years, it can become acute. This, my Mater had.....more prevalent in Alzheimer's than Vascular.....
Well we are hundreds of miles away but from previous experience MIL will refuse help if she has to pay for it! She won't even get a call alarm because she would have to pay!
TBH BIL lives cloned has shown no interest so we are trying to do this at distance and as you recall she's not my biggest fan.
I'm not too bad DTC - thanks hun. Thats really interesting re the facts you are giving - reminding me of a programme I watched just 2 nights ago re a hospital A & E dept where a 31 yr old woman had collapsed with a blinding headache & subsequent seizure, brought in by ambulance. When she came round and was handed some slippers she asked what they were - she genuinely didn't know what they were or what they were for. Turned out she'd had a massive bleed on the brain. Didn't know her husbands name etc..... long story but thankfully she recovered.
Red - why isn't she your biggest fan??
No help to you, I know, but if society expects folk to find over £1k a month just to get the help they need then I have every sympathy with your MIL opting not to ask for such "help". I think I'm not too badly off financially but I'd be seeing everything I've managed to save get taken rapidly at that rate, and I'd think it wasn't worth me being here under such circumstances. Government demands taxes to provide the country and it's citizens' needs, then when you feel you have a claim, they act as if they are an insurance firm and tell you, "No, you should have read the small print".
DTC he has the property and finance one and will be paying a visit to her bank in March when we are over so that he can start 'watching' her activities.
She did not put a medical one in place but has agreed to one so we are also sorting that out in March - doing it ourselves so we won't incur extra costs
Red, my mum had vascular dementia that really didn't worsen over years. It just showed itself up in various ways, one being deja vu. When I took her to hospital appointments she insisted that the same patients were there as when she last visited. She also wrote to the bbc to complain about repeating programmes over and over again. At a world Cup final she turned off the television because she had already seen it.
She never got much help from Social services or any extra payments. She got attendance allowance and I got a pittance of a carers allowance. The doctors didn't even pick up the dementia. I did, because I researched and found out deja vu can be a symptom. She retained a lot of her mental capacity but she was physically disabled.
Dementia is a strange thing. As DTC says there are many varieties. I think there may be much more Vascular Dementia about that never will be picked up.
My mother was as stubborn as your MIL!