44 and finding love

[Minxie]

Hi there, having been recently dumped (this weekend) via text. (some of you would of read my moans :( ) Although I am not out to meet a man now. Still getting over being dumped! But makes me question will I ever meet anyone. As there must of been something really bad about me, being dumped via text after over 3 years together.

Am 45 this year. Lone parent with children. Not a great catch for anyone am I? Feeling glum and probably a bit sorry for myself.

Any one else ever felt the same? Or have some happy ending stories to cheer me up?

Sorry for my whinging !

[Drusilla]

My Gran was 77 when she started seeing her man friend. She had known him when they were children and they met up by chance after their lifetime partners had died. I think my Mum was a little upset at first, but she soon got over it when she saw my Gran so happy. They've been together about five years now.

I also read it's now hip to be in your forties, so best wishes. (Is it the Nigella factor??)

[Lollybo]

Hi minxie, Im 46 - 2 children and have just parted compny from a man i spent 4 years with - it was my decision - the fall out of it all hasnt been easy - but as i said my decision. Knew I had to finish the relationship - tried to do it as easy as i could - face to face - i dont think he was happy about it - i was sorry i had to do it but when you know - you know. Everybody handles their troubles in different ways and everyone reacts differently as well. Time is ticking along its 2 months for me already - its a day by day walk down the road - that might be full of potholes = but im just hoping that when i get to the end of the road whenever that may be - there will be a beautiful beach there.

I hope you can handle the walk - think of the beach - buy a sunhat along the way - and take care. I f you feel you want to dip your toe in the water along the way do it but be careful you dont stub your toe.

It takes all kindsof people to make this world of ours good luck - Lolly xxx

[Minxie]

Thanks Drusilla, thats another lovely story. Part of me thinks there is someone out there for everyone. But having a failed marriage behind me. Which just broke down. And now this, made me sit back, and think, am I really the problem? My lovely teenage daughter thinks I am too hard on myself. I hope life begins at 44 in my case!

[Minxie]

Hi Lolly, you were very brave to end your long term relationship. There obviously were cracks in mine and my now ex boyfriends. I think he just wants to meet someone else. Its been a difficult week. Went out today with my children, and seemed to be surrounded by other happy couples. Kids in bed now, and sitting here with my glass (or two) of wine now. And probably the self pity will heap on.

But I too hope too the beautiful beach will be there some time for me too.

Thank you for your reply. I wish you lots of luck too xx

[jason1980]

Hi, I recenlty saw something on tv that stated that 39% of British adults are single.

Theres no way that 39% can all find each other cos it leaves 0.5% difference...maybe you're in the 0.5% group

[Minxie]

Hi there Jason. Sorry am a dumbo at maths. But hope yours was a positive answer!

[Lollybo]

Hi Minxie,

thanks for the reply - keep on walking down the road.

Ive only been telling myself this today - sometimes, I think will be harder than others. But avoid the dog poo and the potholes and take care.....Lolly

[Minxie]

Thanks Lolly xx

[DebDeb]

Soory I replied to you thinking you were a teenager.Still same advice and you don't have to have a man to be happy.If you don't work get a little job to widen your circle of friends.I have a great circle of friends married and single.The husbands are as much my friends so I guess I am just really lucky.The more people you meet the wider your opportunities.Can't you drag a friend along to a salsa night or something? Forget that man he is a waste of time.

[Otrere]

My dad is 57 this year. My mum died just over 3 years ago. Dad goes to spiritualist church now and has many ladies that he is friends with and recently took a lady out for lunch. You're never too old.

As for dumping you by text..... OK, fine..... this bloke just needs to grow up eh? What a pillock.

[*angelchild*]

this doen't deal directly with me but, my mom is 50, my dad passed away 8 years ago and since then she'd been in dead end relationships and was never completely happy, she just figured the same thing as you; this is it...im older, i have baggage and no one is going to think im worth it. a few months ago i drove her to her first lunch date (funny how things change) when i picked her up i asked her how it went...she said ok, i asked if he was cute she said hes ok...she was frustrated and didnt want to get hurt again. she went out a few more times after i jsut wanted to get her out of the house and it ends up once she was open to finding that one person that would love her no matter what she did. im so happy that she took a risk when she was so scared to becasue it doesnt matter if your 50 or 15 there is someone out there who will recognize your ture beauty and want nothing more then to make you theirs. it may not come right away and it will come when ur not looking for it so never say never and take chances, even if it doesnt work out and you get hurt it will only make you stronger and i think life is a path so take it no matter where it leads you and learn from the mistakes and be soooooooo extremely happy when eventually, one day it'll all work out