looking

[StylinSami]

would you feel jelous if you new that your b/f/husband g/f/wife looked at another man/woman when they wernt with you.

e.g (mainly men) when driving they peep and ever girl that goes past . it doesnt bother me but i was wondering why you do it constently (dont get me wrong i have a good look occasionaly) but not like men do.

just your views really.

SSx

[StylinSami]

and another thing if you had the most gorgeous girl/man at home would you still have a good look at others

[aka pixi]

it wouldnt bother me, my fella looks at other women whether Im there or not. As long as its only looking, I dont see its a problem

[StylinSami]

this is not my point of view personally i think its fine to look at other people as long as there is not touching (you can look but dont touch) same as you say pixi.

[mycats]

Yeah it doesnt bother me at all, Mr Cat has a (tiny) bit of a crush on a girl we vaugly know and I wind him up about it lol I think it's very funny

[Pippa68]

Yeah I look ~ he looks too. I like to wind him up about looking..in fact I usually spot the girl he is gonna look at before he does..I see the girl, look at him, and he glances sideways ~ just moving his eyes! it tickles me..LOL.

[aka pixi]

lmao pippa, I know exactly what you mean lol

[Supernick]

I think it's entirely natural. You can't just turn off finding someone attractive, so if a pretty girl walks past I'll look, and I certainly wouldn't begrudge my girlfriend doing the same. If you're in a happy relationship and you've got some moral standards you won't think about touching.

[peterd]

I wouldn't feel jealous, but I went out with a girl who got really jealous if I looked at any other women. She even got moody if someone nice looking appeared on the telly. It was a nightmare I couldn't win.

[BIG DAD]

Just because your on a diet it does'nt mean you cant look at the menu.

[Pippa68]

Blimey ~ what are you supposed to do..poke out your eyes?

[andy-hughes]

Looking at females is progammed into the male psyche, and has been since the days of cavemen. A man's instinct to reproduce is powerful, and he has to assess all potential mates on site. he looks for large breasts - capabale of feeding, and wide hips - child-bearing, and a healthy appearence - likely to produce children and rear them successfully.

Just because we are 'civilised' doesn't mean we have lost this basic instinct - indeed, a lot of men are simply unaware that they do it.

Any man with a degree of courtesy both for his partner, and any strangers he sees, can ensure that his checking glances are discreet, and if he trains himself, he can stop looking automatically - but that is a matter of choice.

It doesn't infer comparison or derision of a man's wife or partner because he looks at other women, it is inbuilt, and best ignored.

[Pippa68]

I have always gone with that theory too, Andy. It has always perplexed me as to how there are men out there who like skinny women with no boobs, no hips & no bums..;o)

[peterd]

I would have quoted all that to her Andy, but I wouldn't have even got to end of the first sentence.

[natalie_1982]

My hubby looks, though I think there is a difference between a glance at a good looking gal and a gawp. Luckily (for him and me!) he isn't a gawper. And luckily again I generally point girls out to him, and in a sad way I really enjoy sitting there of an evening and watching everyone else and what they look like. He knows I look, I don't think I am a gawper, but I like to appreciate a good looking gent ;-P

[natalie_1982]

Peterd I have a friend like that, well not a friend exactly but my husband's cousin; she is the same age as me and has been with her partner for 5 years. He isn't allowed to go to the bar to order a drink on his own if the bar person is female. One night we stayed in round theirs to watch a film with some wine, and had to leave at 11 as their domestic escalated and I, apparently, had started it!

I know my fella fancies Kelly Brook and was teasing him about her acting and presenting "skills", as he does to me about my celeb crushes, they ended up having all out war on a Saturday night because she was convinced he was going to leave her for Angelina Jolie yelling that if Usher (makes you want to laugh but is really sad and serious) turned up she would run away with him!

I just wanted to shake the pair of them.

[peterd]

I know what you man Natalie_1982, I ain't no creepy gawper either believe me. It's a sad & long story and I won't bore you all with details. Last straw was when she got moody cos I bought a Kylie dvd for my 4yr old niece.

[caz21]

To be honest i do feel slightly jealous but not to the point of scary, its just as natural to feel jealous as it is to look i think, my man looks at pretty girls and i think in my insecure mind its the fact that usually the girl in question is gorgeous and i feel the need to compare myself to them! but at the end of the day i overcome that and know i'm the girl he's with and let him off for being a typical male!

[Rubyrose]

"Look but don't touch". It doesn't bother me.. I am sure my ex did it all the time when I wasn't there but in all the years we were together I only caught him looking a few times when I was with him. I would just laugh about it really. It was fine. I looked all the time but I can't believe how much I look now that I am single. I must have been missing out on so much!

[unruliejulie]

I have to say, i don't like it. Thats my own insecurity though. What the eye doesn't see and all that but when they do it and you're with them, then i think that is disrespectful.Luckily my hubby is not one of these men but God knows what he looks at when i'm not around. I don't really think about it.We all do it to some extent but some men can be quite insensitive about doing it and this is what i, personally, would find hurtful.

[joko]

years ago, an ex of mine (who hadn't had many girlfriends before) knew all the theory of what is good and bad, right and wrong etc in a relationship, and decided to take the "if we are secure it shouldn't matter if we look at other people as long as thats all we do" situation a bit further and not just look, but point out every pretty girl and then tell me why he thought she was nice, such as " she's got really nice legs, hasn't she", "she's got a really nice shaped bum" or whatever in great detail. he would then look at me expectantly for my comments and ask if i agreed.

now i didn't mind him looking but i didn't appreciate the running commentary.

so obviously i began to do it back to him - and guess what he didn't like it!