man trouble...

[x sparkle x]

hey people, i need your advice! basically my mum has let my bf move in for the last 4 months as he had nowhere else to go. it was fine til recently but now he only comes home to eat, shower and sleep. every night he's going to the gym, playing footie or seeing friends which i understand but he keeps leaving me out of his plans. i keep inviting him out but he wont come and tonight he'd rather go to his mates sisters party than spend time with me after not seeing me for a week as i was away. im feeling used as all he wants is a place to stay and wont ever invite me out. am i being stupid feeling this way??
:o( xx

[nat_84]

no i dont think ur being stupid. I would be completely peed off and feel used to.

Its totally disrespectful what he's doing and i feel sorry for ur mum having to put up with it too.

Have serious words!

[Champagne]

Well, for one thing, it shows what he'd be like if you ever got your own place together!!

Personally I don't think it's acceptable. If you are a social person yourself then you are entitled to want to spend quality time out with your man. It'd be different, of course, if you were a couch potato. I don't see how you can share interests if you can't even talk about shared times together. You need to get tough and tell him that you won't stand for it.

Have you spoken to your mother about it? She may have her own opinions of the situation and give you some advice. Either way, if you are going to confront him then it may be worth giving your mum the 'heads up' so that she knows there is an issue. You'll need her support.

[x sparkle x]

yeah i have spoken to her and from her point of view our relationship has gone stale and we're apparently like an old married couple! she said he won't be welcome here any more if it carries on like this. il give him his due he does do a lot to help round the house and will go out of his to do it but i want him to spend quality time with me too. it seems he forgets about me and he's the one angry with me for confronting him.

[oldwoman]

He"s gone from Lover to Lodger. By helping out around the house he"s trying to keep in with the one keeping the roof over his head- your mam

[CrazyDaisy80]

Hello Sparkle.... I had the same Problem. Boyfriend who was lovely got chucked out of Home, my Mum said he could move in with us and he turned from lovely Man to Monster overnight!!

I confronted him and said that I didn't like it, why I didn't like it and what would happen if it didn't improve and he is now being fantastic.

I would also add that if he doesn't like you confronting him then maybe this shows what kind of Man he is and you ought to have a think about whether you wanna be with him.

I know it's hard but living with anyone needs to be worked at by all Parties.

Good Luck,
CrazyDaisy80
xXx

[crete]

really sorry to say this to you but i think he is taking the p_s_out of you and your mum he is acting more like a lodger than a boyfriend pack his bags sorry

[BigBishop]

Free accomodation! Cool, can I stay?

[x sparkle x]

no he does pay rent each week, the same amount as me!
we had a chat last night and he was so upset i didnt realise how depressed he'd bee feeling about work, being chucked out of home etc which is why he's escaping to the gym. we're both gonna try!