ChatterBank3 mins ago
male masturbation
55 Answers
Can any guys give me some perspective on this? I live with my bf and he masturbates when I am not there and it is a real issue for me - big time. I know people will say yeah its not big deal etc but for me it is.
In addition to this he has also been phoning sex chat lines, I dont care about the money spent aspect its the hurt thing. The thought of him getting off while talking to complete strangers really hurts me.
He knows how I feel but says that it is no big deal, he can live with what he does.
Im finding it hard to live with - I cant make myself feel ok about it.
In addition to this he has also been phoning sex chat lines, I dont care about the money spent aspect its the hurt thing. The thought of him getting off while talking to complete strangers really hurts me.
He knows how I feel but says that it is no big deal, he can live with what he does.
Im finding it hard to live with - I cant make myself feel ok about it.
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For more on marking an answer as the "Best Answer", please visit our FAQ.Are you prepared to have sex with him everytime he wants to masurbate? Are you willing to talk dirty to him when he wants that? Is porn acceptable?
Its a fact of life, Im afraid. I think this will continue to be an issue until you get over your insecurities. Maybe a trip to relate is needed. How do you know he masturbates when you arent there??????
Its a fact of life, Im afraid. I think this will continue to be an issue until you get over your insecurities. Maybe a trip to relate is needed. How do you know he masturbates when you arent there??????
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I cant offer him sex instead of masturbation as he does it when Im not there. Im very willing to do anything he wants, he just seems to not want it, he prefers his right hand.
We dont have much sex, only really when he has a few drinks, maybe once every 3 weeks and that mainly consists of me pleasuring him.
I know he does it when Im not there because he usually tells me, I have such an issue that I ask or I can tell when he has and when he hasnt.
How come people think that sex chat lines are not ok and masturbation is. It is still the act of masturbation and him looking and thinking about other people.
We dont have much sex, only really when he has a few drinks, maybe once every 3 weeks and that mainly consists of me pleasuring him.
I know he does it when Im not there because he usually tells me, I have such an issue that I ask or I can tell when he has and when he hasnt.
How come people think that sex chat lines are not ok and masturbation is. It is still the act of masturbation and him looking and thinking about other people.
but they aren't people he is going to be touching. Sex chat lines are a problem for some because it involves talking to a real person, unless its a story type line.
You two really sound like you need to see a therapist (not words I would say often). If it cant work, find someone who will make you feel happy. 99.9% of men you will date will masturbate, you have to get over this issue, I would imagine he might not feel like having sex with you if you are nagging him about having a crafty hand shandy. I can understand your issue with him not having sex with you often but the masturbation should be left and I really feel that is your issue.
Do you initiate sex at all?
You two really sound like you need to see a therapist (not words I would say often). If it cant work, find someone who will make you feel happy. 99.9% of men you will date will masturbate, you have to get over this issue, I would imagine he might not feel like having sex with you if you are nagging him about having a crafty hand shandy. I can understand your issue with him not having sex with you often but the masturbation should be left and I really feel that is your issue.
Do you initiate sex at all?
trigger - I cant make him feel like I feel, If I do it he says it doesnt bother him, it wouldnt would it, it just means he has a good reason to do it himself!
redcrx - I think masturbation does involve thinking about other people, I know he is not thinking of me when he is watching porn or whatever! He does not say it to upset me.
He wont go to therapy, he has much bigger issues than this that he wont go to therapy for!
We talk all the time about everything so communication isnt the issue.
I do initiate sex, most times if he doesnt feel like it, thats it. Once I lay naked on the bed when he came in and he said "yeah very nice but the football is on"
redcrx - I think masturbation does involve thinking about other people, I know he is not thinking of me when he is watching porn or whatever! He does not say it to upset me.
He wont go to therapy, he has much bigger issues than this that he wont go to therapy for!
We talk all the time about everything so communication isnt the issue.
I do initiate sex, most times if he doesnt feel like it, thats it. Once I lay naked on the bed when he came in and he said "yeah very nice but the football is on"
hmmm bigger issues.
Right, does he talk down to you? ( I ask this because my cousins partner is the same and he says things like I cant go out with you because you embarrass me )
Is he abusive? Physically or mentally?
Does he lose his erection during sex? This is no reflection on you whatsoever by the way!
Right, does he talk down to you? ( I ask this because my cousins partner is the same and he says things like I cant go out with you because you embarrass me )
Is he abusive? Physically or mentally?
Does he lose his erection during sex? This is no reflection on you whatsoever by the way!
YES he does talk down to me, he thinks he is better than me.
He does go out with me, he is not embarrassed of me but is v subtle with put downs, remarking about I always look tired or I have put on weight or going on about my children (not his), nothing is right etc etc. He is under stress (a lot of it self inflicted)
No his erection stays there ages after he has come.
He does go out with me, he is not embarrassed of me but is v subtle with put downs, remarking about I always look tired or I have put on weight or going on about my children (not his), nothing is right etc etc. He is under stress (a lot of it self inflicted)
No his erection stays there ages after he has come.
liquidspace.
When your boyfriend is not there do you ever go to the toilet? Once a month do you have a period or ever cough when you have a tickle in your throat?
Personally I find these things disgusting and wrong. You should be ashamed of yourself!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
The point I am making is that whacking one out is as natural as other bodily functions. Most mammals do it. Monkeys jerk off in cages, dogs rub up your leg and even give their gonads a little lick.
He is hardly going to stop because you disapprove. May I suggest you just accept it.
If not, I can assure you 100 percent of men do it. Even vicars.
I agree the phone thing is a bit much, but it is a multi-million pound industry so he is not alone. But it is harmless fun. Nobody gets hurt and some tom in Cuba is earning a living without walking the streets.
When your boyfriend is not there do you ever go to the toilet? Once a month do you have a period or ever cough when you have a tickle in your throat?
Personally I find these things disgusting and wrong. You should be ashamed of yourself!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
The point I am making is that whacking one out is as natural as other bodily functions. Most mammals do it. Monkeys jerk off in cages, dogs rub up your leg and even give their gonads a little lick.
He is hardly going to stop because you disapprove. May I suggest you just accept it.
If not, I can assure you 100 percent of men do it. Even vicars.
I agree the phone thing is a bit much, but it is a multi-million pound industry so he is not alone. But it is harmless fun. Nobody gets hurt and some tom in Cuba is earning a living without walking the streets.
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