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No best answer has yet been selected by smartyangel*. Once a best answer has been selected, it will be shown here.
For more on marking an answer as the "Best Answer", please visit our FAQ.I think that's a great answer, snook. It's not something someone else can tell you. You sound like you're smart enough to not leap into having sex at 13... one thing you may want to think about is: what aside from intercourse constitutes sex - I think a lot of teenagers don't think of oral sex as sex now, for example, but I would consider that sex because it is very intimate and you can get STDs from it. For me at age 13, kissing probably would have been appropriate but probably not much else.
You should just think about what feels right to you, and really be willing to stop whatever your boyfriend and you are doing if you are at all weirded out by it. As snook says, go slowly and it will all feel more momentous when you go further - and you're both ready for it!
I really would consider oral as sex, I know some of my friends consider it *more* intimate than sex. I mean, the nature of it means you're very close to a very personal place.
For 13, let's see, I don't think I even liked boys at that age! But I'd say just stick to kissing. I know I'm going to sound like an old lady (hey, I'm only 18!) but thinking about sex at 13 just isn't worth it. Try kissing first because first off, it's just a good thing. It's fun, free and barring a cold sore, there are no dangers involved! Hugs and kisses are what I would say is appropriate, I can't really think of much else. I know you'll probably be curious about his body and stuff, but take your time, and don't listen to what other people are doing with their boy/girl friends. They're probably lying.
You sound like you're on the right track, I'm sure I don't need to tell you not to let yourself get pushed into anything. Just enjoy yourself, do what feels right, that's what it's all about.
I'm sure your mum means to be helpful, but sometimes it's hard for parents to realise their children are growing up. By telling you it's OK as long as G-d approves of it, she is leaving it to your conscience. You seem sensible enough, so your mum has obviously done a good job at bringing you up to make your own decisions.
Go slowly. Don't do anything that doesn't feel right. Talk to your boyfriend. If he shares your values and considers your feelings you will both be fine.
Do you have a teen counsellor at your school or church you could talk to about this face to face? Someone outside the family? It might help.