If love is the highest emotion then why does it not work both ways?

[postage]

I’ve known a friend for over 15 years ---well he’s more then a friend. But we don,t live together.
Due to some technical problems within life styles.
He claims he loves me but I have never loved him but got used to having someone around when needed.
He’s obsessive and very insecure. He’s moody and can turn on you at the slightest of thing.
Last two years I’ve completely gone off him and find it very difficult even to sleep with him!!!! What should I do.

Because lack of passion he swears at me a lot

[rojash]

"I have never loved him but got used to having someone around when needed. "

Sounds like it's time you stopped using him and let him get himself into a proper relationship.

[postage]

yes but he feels the same so we kind of used each other for many many years nothing wrong inthat

[jackthehat]

Except that neither of you are happy.....

End the relationship. Find someone that you enjoy sleeping with and let him do the same.

[naomi24]

If you don't live with him, tell him you don't want to see him any more.

[pa___ul3]

got to agree with rojash, maybe part of his temper is fueled by the frustration of not being able to have you properly.
I think you're being unfair to him. It sounds like finding love is not something you're that bothered about but he is.

[postage]

pa---uls
you could be right i I was,nt all that bothered about finding love until recently when I have to force my self to sleep with him. It just makes me sick.
Why is that????
why cant I make it work????

[naomi24]

//why cant I make it work???? //

Because it makes you sick, perhaps?

People go off people. It happens. Time to start again.

[B00]

"Last two years I’ve completely gone off him and find it very difficult even to sleep with him!!!! What should I do. "

Stop sleeping with him perhaps???

[rowanwitch]

The friends with benefits bit isn't working..you haven't got a relationship... walk away so you can both find the person you need

[ummmm]

Sex with him makes you feel sick and you still do it??

[maggiebee]

Think you already know the answer. Don't live together; don't want to sleep with him; he swears at you; you have never loved him. Maybe some hints in these statements?? Get out girl.

[postage]

Yes what a shame that people you known for so long ----suddenly make you sick and I mean physically sick. May be its time to move on.. Trouble is he’s really ugly I know I shouldn’t say this but it’s true. I am no oil painting but am not ugly either.
I just hate the smell the talk the walk every thing. And sex is so bang bang thank you so borring and so …………. Makes me sick

[ummmm]

If you weren't forcing yourself to have sex with you probably wouldn't feel like this now.

[RATTER15]

This is obviously a windup!!!

[EvianBaby]

I can't imagine letting myself have sex with someone who makes me want to vomit.

[jackthehat]

Ask him to leave money on your dressing table, it might help you get through the chore of having sex with...

[maggiebee]

On a previous post you said you were 58. Haven't you learned anything during these years or do you just like winding people up?

[katdarn79]

Agree with Ratter!!

[postage]

Hmmmm that is so true – I thought about it, in the past I have had to force my self and I never got over that. I think that had bad effect on me, and that why I just feel sick.

Well I had no where and no one to turn to he was there, he was always very rude and nasty to me and still is but I don,t need him so much now I have my own flat and my job and I have money.3

Why should be sick over him,, and specially when he swears at me if I don’t want to have sex.

[RATTER15]

To be honest postage, I think this is a wind up but just the thought of you performing that act of having sex with someone so ugly to you, such an offensive smell to you, it sounds almost like animals, only animals dont treat each other that way.

Gross!!!