Is This Infidelity?

[cameliaheartfelt]

If your husband joins twitter and follows an old flame, is this
Infidelity? She has followed him back but they havent made direct
contact, it is like an unsaid communication. She is always tweeting
generally saying where she is, what she's doing etc and retweets quotes like don't leave it too late to tell someone how u feel. Hubby claims he didnt know
you could see someone on twitter without following them. He
says he was just being nosey, I feel like he has broken our marriage
vows and I feel differently about him and us now.

[China Doll]

No, it's definitely not infidelity! That's a complete overreaction.

You might see it as a betrayal of trust or it may make you uncomfortable and that needs to be discussed. But it's not like they've even emailed or anything really if I've understood how twitter works.

[Sqad]

Probably.

\\\\I feel differently about him and us now\\\

So what is your next move?

[sara3]

it's not infidelity, but I wouldn't be pleased about it. would he be happy if you started looking up previous partners?

[Jeza]

I think Twitter, facebook etc is the curse of the modern world.

[woofgang]

its not what I think, its what you think....

[pastafreak]

I don't know too much about twitter. But if following an old flame or friend of the opposite sex is infidelity,then an awful lot of marriage vows are being broken both on there and FB .
No-I don't see it as infidelity.

[emmie]

it may not be infidelity, but i wouldn't be best pleased.

[friedgreentomato]

No and what an over reaction on your part!!

[ummmm]

Absolutely not. Your attitude is akin with a insecure teenager.

If you don't like it then tell him straight but it's certainly not infidelity.

[boxtops]

No, it isn't - people can often be friends with old flames. It's not a problem to have friends of the opposite sex too.
However we are all different - how would your husband feel if it was you doing this, not him? YOu need to ask him.

[Eve]

I'm on but don't use Twitter but use Facebook a lot and have a fair few exes as Facebook friends, some serious relationship ones, some less so serious. There is nothing in it at all.

I'm single at the moment but it wasn't a problem when I was in a relationship, I don't imagine it's a problem for them either. I'm respectful to their partners, I'll comment on statuses or pictures from time to time but would never mention being an ex or relating to our time together if they are with someone (most of them are now married).

I'm not a jealous person though, my last ex still got on very well with his ex wife and her partner and we'd meet up sometimes or sometimes he'd go and meet her for lunch, I never had a problem with it.

[bednobs]

i remember you from before - he was unfaithful wasn't he? As the others said, it's what you feel about it that matters tho

[missnemesis]

I don't think it's infidelity I do however think it's highly inappropriate an my OH wouldn't get away with it.

[Prudie]

It all depends how secure you are or if you are the jealous type. personally I'd feel betrayed but that's me. It's certainly not infidelity though, doesn't that actually involve physical contact?

[tamborine]

he is disloyal to you….ask him if he wants your marriage to continue OR kick him out so he can follow his trollop

[ChillDoubt]

It's not infidelity.

But IMHO it doesn't bode well as such online activities tend to go a bit pear shaped.

Tell him how you feel about it before it goes any further.

[Sqad]

OK........

What do you think are the chances of HIM meeting up with HER?

100% I would say.

[ummmm]

You just can't help yourself can you Sqad?

So when I added my ex as a friend on FB you'd assume I had a ulterior motive?

[sherrardk]

It's more curiosity I think. Have you discussed with your husband how you feel about it?

[ChillDoubt]

Let's keep it about the OP ummmm, not you.

Everyone's relationships are different and partners react differently to such activities. cameliaheartfelt obviously has difficulty in dealing with how her husband has behaved, so let's keep it about her.

I quite agree with Sqad.