Why Does Everything To Do With Dating Have To Be So Complicated?

[tandh]

I met this guy the other week and he fixed a door for me which he didn't want to charge me for. Before he left he asked me out for a drink in a few days time. we had a lovely evening and he was such a gentleman too. we then took my dog for a walk the next day, and text everyday for the next couple of days. But then, long story short, i then started to think that he was married, and told him this which i think really insulted him, but i did justify why i thought this. It basically ended with me telling him not to contact me as i didn't want to develop feelings for a married man. Its been nearly two weeks since that and i can't stop thinking about him. I text him on monday saying that it was international batman day ( we had a joke about him being batman on the date) but he didn't reply. I feel so weird and sad and i don't know what to do because i am not sure if he's married so i don't know weather it's right to try to pursue him, and i also don't know if he really hates me for what i said.... oh

[Scarlett]

Did he deny being married? Did he go out of his way to reassure you that he's not? Sounds to me that you guessed correctly and he's peeved and embarrassed that you're right. You miss him and what could have been but if he was single I really think he would have just said that he was and not overreacted like that. Have you tried looking him up on Facebook and seeing if he's got a partner in photos? Either way he's walked away from you and hasn't texted you back so I'd just leave him to it now.

[Answerprancer]

Maybe he's in denial to his wife that he's gay?

[tandh]

gay? why would he be going on dates with me if he's gay?
He said he wasn't married, and addressed a few of the reasons i gave for thinking he was married and then said he was a bit thrown when i apologized for saying that i thought he was married. he then said he was tired and was going to bed at 9:30 which upset me a bit as i thought it was quite rejecting, that's when i said to not contact me.
I can't even sleep thinking about all this. I'm not on faebook and i don't even know his last name so couldn't even find him on there if i wanted to. I'm trying to think if he asked if i was on there.... i know a few men have asked me but don't know if he has, that would be a good indication if he did want to be friends on there as it shows all his life. I do remember saying that his account is very well hidden which i liked as i'm very similar, hate people knowing all about me

[silliemillie]

Think Answerprancer is referring to your status which is showing 'male'??

[ummmm]

What made you think he was married?

I was seeing a married man once and I didn't have a clue until his wife phoned me.

[bednobs]

"that would be a good indication if he did want to be friends on there as it shows all his life"
pmsl facebook shows the world what you wnt them to see
I wondered how old you are?

[naomi24]

Never chase a man. If he hasn't responded to your text it's because, for whatever reason, he doesn't want to. Leave it. You'll meet someone else.

[ummmm]

^^^I agree with that.

[grasscarp]

If a man wants to see you he will find a way. If he doesn't he will make excuses. No good trying to track him down. Very likely you were right in thinking he was married. At least you got your door fixed for nothing.

[Old_Geezer]

You said you didn't want to get feelings for a married man and he wasn't to contact you: and you got half your wish at least as he's not contacting you. Nothing complicated there; you simply need to move on now.

[EDDIE51]

You blew him out what do you expect?

[woofgang]

what EDDIE said. Move on.

[Barmaid]

Woofgang is right, move on. You've only had a couple of dates so there is no long term investment there. Given that after only 2 dates you are making allegations that he may be less than trustworthy, he may well have thought getting out at an early stage was advisable.

[Sqad]

\\\\ It basically ended with me telling him not to contact me as i didn't want to develop feelings for a married man. \\\

So he didn't contact you........that's not so complicated.....is it?

If you fancy him.....then pursue him. He will either take the bait or not....that's also not complicated.

[Patsy33]

Just listen to your intuition. He probably is married. You're well rid of him. Don't waste any of your precious emotional/mental energy on him anymore. You're worth more than that.x

[saintpeter48]

You say you don't know his surname, how did you contact him in the first place to fix your door, was he just passing by, was he recommended to you by a friend, did you answer an ad?

[whiskeryron]

// i'm very similar, hate people knowing all about me // So why on earth are you on Faeces Book ?

[Baldric]

tandh said,

///I'm not on faebook and i don't even know his last name so couldn't even find him on there///

[tandh]

oops, sory answer prancer, i'm female.
He has a wedding ring that he wears on his ring finger but on the other hand, he said belonged to his grandad, but it has diamonds on it, i thought that was only a recent thing that has come into fashion. Although i didn't even ask, he said that he doesn't like anyone knowing where he lives, he got *** that i got foundation on his top at the end of a date, is this because he was going home to his wife. And lastly, on the 2nd date someone kept calling and texting him and then he said he was tired and had to go and 9:30, when he told me he only needs 4 hours sleep a night prior to this
lol, that's probably true bednobs, but i would be *** if my partner had facebook and didn't include me in any of it. i'm 27, why do you ask?
i didn't even get my door fixed for nothing, as i insisted on paying him, probably not as much as i would have been charged but still, and this isn't really about what i've gained out of something. I would rather had a nice relationship with him than a door i can lock.
he hangs out where i walk my little pup, i talk to a lot of the people there and i met him briefly when he was with his friend that i knew. I then bumped into him when he was by himself and it was all a fate really, i was telling him about my house and how i'd been let down by someone coming to fix my door, and then it turned out he was a window and door fitter.
lol i'm not on facebook for that very reason.
I think most of what you guys have said is right, i know i've either really insulted him if it's not true or *** him off if it is. i'm so *** with myself though, i wish i had of thought about it more before i became so dismissive of him and told him to leave me alone. it's just really hard as i don't want to be with someone that is married, but thinking about it's not really up to me weather i want to see him or not as he would have contacted me if he wanted to. The annoying thing is I've done the same thing to three guys i really like because i think i am so frightened of getting hurt, if one little thing doesn't seem right i just walk away. This is the first time i've really regretted it though. I know i haven't known him long but i just felt such a connection and i felt so safe with him. I also really couldn't wait to have a sexual relationship with him, which often doesn't really happen with someone new straight away

[Answerprancer]

Millie was right, sorry, I thought you were a bloke.