Threesome Relationship Advice

[Bigjaykay]

My soon to be wife and I (both 30) are open and honest about everything. She has told me she has been in a threesome before (both MMF AND FFM). She has said that she would like to do this again. I told her if things got stale we would talk about it later, but I don't think I could see her with another guy. She is attracted to women also, and said that she is fine with it. She is more sexually adventurous than I am. Also, she said she would let me bring it up, since I was the one uncomfortable with it. My questions are; Will this change our relationship? Our sex life? Is it normal to feel insecure and worried? She has already said if it doesn't happen she would be ok with it. But am I depriving her with my insecurities? And am I missing out on something with her?

[grasscarp]

You are clearly worried about this. This behaviour would change your relationship. You know and say here that you dont want to see her with other men. It is not normal to feel insecure and worried just before you get married. It is the time you should be feeling very happy that you are about to commit for life to the person that you love. Yes you will be depriving her of something she enjoys or enjoyed. And she will be depriving you of the security and contentment of being with someone who only wants to have sexual relations with you.

[ummmm]

Don't do it.

It's not insecurities that stops people from wanting another person involved in their sex life.

[murraymints]

walk away. !

[Kathyan]

Sorry, but if she wants to do this she isn't committed to you. Don't get married, it will end n tears.

[ummmm]

What's commitment got to do with it?

It works for some couples who have happy marriages.

Any doubts though and it's a NO.

[dannyk13]

A difficult choice for you, but if you are uncomfortable with this then you should walk away now.

[ummmm]

Walk away from what? She's said it's ok if it doesn't happen.

[murraymints]

it will always hover in the background..walk !

[Zacs-Master]

Isn't that what Sting did?

[rockyroad]

Why does she want to get married?

[dannyk13]

Have you thought about living together to see how things work out? Your fiancee says she is OK with it but she may change her mind at a later date.

[elliemay1]

Not a great basis for a marriage IMO

[ummmm]

It's fine if both parties are in agreement. Bigjaykay is clearly not.

[woofgang]

so how would you feel if you said no and she was fine about you two not being two of the threesome but then she went and was the third person in another couple’s threesome?

[rockyroad]

What is the point of getting married if your partner yearns for sex with other people ?

[elliemay1]

Think of a time in the future when you might have children.

[ummmm]

My gosh you people. Loads of people experiment in their sex lives. This doesn't mean their marriage won't work.

[grasscarp]

She might have been in mmf and ffm. But after marriage it will be a man joining the pair of them. or a woman. What would he get out of a man joining in? even he has sussed this does not bode well.

[rockyroad]

Of course their marriage will suffer if he doesn't feel comfortable with the situation! If they were both into it he would not be posting on here about his concerns would he?