Only By Under The Table Means Would This...
Crosswords1 min ago
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For more on marking an answer as the "Best Answer", please visit our FAQ.when i was 2 i sat on the bus with my mum and loudly declared that i had farted, my mum was mortified!
My brother used to scream 'take me home to my mummy' when i took him into town (i was 15 he was 3) making me look like i was stealing him lol
and my son, although he cant talk, when he was 2 and we were in a queue, in a very busy sainsburys, decided to root around down my top and proceeded to cause me to flash my bits (thank god i had a bra on) to the whole shop and wouldnt let go of my top!
This didnt happen to me i dont have any kids it was just on a funny email my mum sent, thought you would appreciate it
While in line at the bank one afternoon, my toddler decided to release some pent-up energy and ran amok. I was finally able to grab hold of her after receiving looks of disgust and annoyance from
other patrons. I told her that if she did not start behaving "right now" she would be punished. To my horror, she looked me in the eye and said in a voice just as threatening, "If you don't let me go
right now, I'll tell Grandma that I saw you kissing Daddy's pee-pee last night!". The silence was deafening after this enlightening exchange. Even the tellers stopped what they were doing. I mustered
up the last of my dignity and walked out of the bank with my daughter in tow. The last thing I heard when the door closed behind me were screams of laughter.
Taking my three-year-old daughter on the bus to nursery one day, she saw her first black person, an elderly gentleman who sat nest to us.
"Daddy!" she exclaimed, "That man's got black skin!" and everyone, including the gentleman, smiled.
"Yes, I said, he's a black man." and thought that was the end of it, but no.
Having studied the man with the intensity that only children of that age can muster, she turned to me, and in a stage whisper, audible to everyone on the bus, she confided -
"Daddy ... he's got black EARS!" and still everyone smiled, thank goodness!
I was putting up a shelf in my 4-year-old bedroom. I was screwing the attatchments in when he turned to me and said - Mammy your such a good screwer - your the best screwer in the nuniverse LOL
Also we went on one of those day out with Thomas things the other day (Thomas the Tank Engine) as all mums and dads know Thomas lives on the Island of Sodor. My little boy can't say Sodor and instead went round very loudly singing I'm on the Island of Sod-off at the top of his voice for the whole day !
Sorry I'm a bit late....!
Lots of little bloopers from my own but the best was from my nephew. (I've told this on here before)
My sister had taken him, aged 3, to have his hair cut. It was all going very well when he suddenly announced in a very loud voice..'Ooooh my winkie's sticking up!' The trainee, who was watching, fell off his stool laughing!
That reminds me of an incident my mother takes great delight in reminding me off in front ot people. When I was very young we were out for someones birthday with the family at a nice restaurant when I stood up and boldly announced to the world "when I see pretty girls on the telly my willy stands on end!"
As far as I know we never ate there again!