Same room or not ?

[woodchopper]

My wife is expecting our first child in 2 weeks time - there is argument whether to keep the baby in the same room as us for the first few months or to have it literally in the next room but with a baby monitor - I would appreciate your views please.

[jollygreen]

We have a 4 and half month old boy who sleeps in our room. You will find that you sleep very lightly (mother nature's way of making sure you are alert to the baby's needs!). Our health visitor said it would be fine to have the baby in the next room with a monitor but I feel more secure having him right next to me. Also babies can be pretty noisy in their sleep - its much easier to roll over and check that everything is ok than keep trotting back and forward to the nursery - which I promise you would happen. Best of luck with whatever you decide! Mrs Jollygreen

[grumpii]

Our first child spent six months in our room being jumped on evey time he coughed and is now very sensitive. Our second child was in her own room (with monitor) after six weeks and she has balls of steel both have good humour and are very inteligent hope this helps.

[grumpii]

p.s. we didnt jump on him cos he coughed litterally if he farted we just gave him a chinese burn x

[boobesque]

Emmy has no choice to be in our room, but if your wife breast feeds then i would say its miles easier! I just get Emmy out, feed her, plonk her back and sleep, no need to get out of my nice warm bed!

I have always felt securer with my babies in with me :-)

[Fairie]

my first child stayed in the room with me, but spent most of the time in my bed and hated his cot, second child in cot in my room till about 4 months old and third child was about 3 months then in own room,

[Wagon_Wheel]

Midwives and health professionals now recommend that babies spend the first six months of their lives in their own bed but in the parent's room. In practice this can be easier said than done, however, especially if you or your partner are returning to work and need the sleep!

My best advice is to be guided by the size and weight of your baby when it arrives. We had a large healthy baby and within six weeks we had moved him to his own room with a baby monitor. It also depends on how protective you are as parents and how you feel once the baby arrives. You may be surprised at how this changes your perception and preferences.

Very best of luck with the new arrival and let us know what happens.

[meltoadhall]

1st child in own room at 6 weeks - nightmare since i breastfed and had to get up in the night so often!!. 2nd and 3rd children slept in bed with us and then in cot next to bed and then around 4 months moved out into their own rooms (well shared with siblings).
whatever works for you and what you feel happy with.

[annie0000]

My first stayed in his own crib or cot in our room until he was about 10 months old - our second until he was just over a year, but that was for practical reasons, we only had two rooms and I didn't want to disturb my older sons sleep as he was only 13 months old when no 2 was born! But then, maybe I am just too soft - we did however save on the cost of a baby monitor!

[andy-hughes]

I'd advocate baby sharing your room, in her own cot, from birth to at least three or four months.

Babies identify their mother by smell, so having mum's scent near will make baby feel secure, and she will sleep better. It's far easier to tend to her quickly if she is distressed, and it's just a nicer feeling for her, and her parents.

For what it's worth, let her have a dummy if she wants one - the old wives' tales about buck teeth and so on are just that - so ignore them. A little comfort in the night makes sure everyone sleeps properly.

When she's three, tell her you are giving all her dummies to Santa to take to all the new babies in the world. Job done.

[woodchopper]

Many thanks for your advice.

[Phantaxus]

We had our daughter in our room. found it easier on mother and daughter for night feeds, less disruptive on the sleep pattern.

Other advice

We bought one of those camera/ tv monitor things from woolworths for about 50 quid (they were on offer) brilliant bit of kit. hearing baby is ok but being able to see what they are up to is so much better.

Buy a breast pump and pump some milk into a bottle after babys first feed. store in the fridge and give it to baby for its night time feed. I found it a good way to bond with my daughter and it gives my time off at the end of the day. Also I was told morning milk is richer so it tends to send them to sleep. We used to call it "baby knock out drops"

[corraine]

You will sleep easier if you have the baby in the same room as you for the first few months, you may find that you are listening out more if you are relient on a baby monitor in another room and this will disturb you more, also in the first few months the quicker you can get to a baby when it cries the more chance you have of settling it quickly. In the first few months babies only cry when they actually need something, it's a survival mecanism thats inbred so if your baby cries you need to go straight to it, however be aware that babies do learn fairly quickly that their crying gets a good responce it's finding the balance as parents thats often a challenge. Good luck