How do you feel about your Mother?

[EcclesCake]

To get away from what should be a warm and fuzzy thread about mothers it has become apparent that many of us do not have warm and fuzzy feelings for our mums.

Mine was a liar who never told me the truth about so many things. I tried many times to get the truth from her but it changed every time she proffered it, consequently I have no faith in a word she ever told me.

It might seem trivial to many of you but not knowing the 'truth' of your heritage and background has a surprising impact on your mind set.

[wendilla]

My parents adopted me when I was 18 months old so I never did know my real mother. As far as I know I was unwanted. But my adopted parents gave me a good upbringing. This is why I posted that sentimental thread(HAD TO SHARE THIS) on chatterbank last night as I have done my best to give my own children a good upbringing and I have been well rewarded with their love.I feel I have given them the true love of a mother that I never had.and I am also a grandmother.

[tiggerblue10]

Apart from personality clashes and the odd argument I get on with my mum. Its my dad who winds me up the most though. He is stubborn and moody like me. We had a row on Saturday which left me quite upset. Not sure why things have turned out like this but it may be to do with the fact that he hit me a couple of times when I was a child and also once when I was 17 because I wanted to go to a nightclub for my 18th birthday and he wouldn't let me go.

My parents were very strict and wouldn't let me go out with my friends. I started rebelling at 16 and just went out regardless of what they said. I only went out during the day and never stayed out late.

[EcclesCake]

Wendilla, I'm pleased to hear you had a good life with your adopted parents and have given your children and grarndchildren a loving environment to grow in.

Tigger that's tough on you, were you an only child or only girl?

[tiggerblue10]

I was an only child until 17, then my brother came along. I think it was more to do with my Turkish Cypriot background. My mum was engaged at 16, married at 17 and had me at 18 and I think my parents were hoping that I'd stay at home and wait until I met a man and got married before I went out.

25 years later I'm living on my own with a 10 month of baby! Lol

[EcclesCake]

Mmm, I think I would have rebelled too!

[tiggerblue10]

Well, quite Eccles!

[CAJ1]

My mother gave me up when I was younger and I was fostered, she then moved house without telling me her new address and I didn't speak to her for 10 years as I had no way of contacting her. I recently found out where she lived and wrote to her with no response, my dad says she has moved on and when she divorced him she didn't take any photos of us with her. She now spends her time going on cruises and has a new car... I guess material things are more important to her and she doesn't want us.

The annoying thing is that I still want her to be my Mum, even after 10 years of no contact and her giving me up and ignoring me. I don't hate her (although I probably should), I miss not being able to tell her things I have done that she should be proud of, I miss not having a family unit, I resent having to sort my younger brother out when he hits bad times. If she was to turn around tomorrow and say sorry for all that has happened I may well accept her back into my life. If she waits until she is an old lady before she does that I don't know that I could forgive her...it would almost be like she was saying sorry because she knew she was dying and might go to hell! So all in all, mixed feelings for my mother