holidaying on his own

[suzie1]

my husband of 6 years has been going on holiday to corfu greece, every year for two weeks alone(thats what he says) he never takes me and the kids, coz he says he needs 'time alone' and never goes out normally and treats himself to a break once a year instead. He also claims that the kids are too small to go too far and he doesnt even take us inland. kids are 4 and 2. im confused as he is always at home, if not at work, he drives a taxi and works friday and saturday nights, so i cant really think that he would have someone else as when would he see her. I love him dearly, but i cannot understand why he wont take us away and what the real reason behind this is......what is corfu in greece like.....he stays at the kerkyra golf hotel in alykes......what do you people think about this, also he ahs asked me to take a loan in my name for 30grand coz he wants to invest in shares and gov bonds, i agreed, coz i dont want to not be supportive to him........

[sara3]

I don't know if he has other motives, but you will be responsible for that loan and not him. have you asked yourself why?

also, I think it's fair for him to want a break, maybe an occasional weekend away with the boys playing golf.. but not every year for 2 weeks without his family.

it's just odd.

[suzie1]

as we have had alot of problems in the past,and i havent really supported him due to having problems of my own i.e deppressionand having tried suicide several times, which failed. i have just got myself in order, i.e got a job, bit of confidence and now i want my husband to be dedicated to me and not go away on his own, i have seen his tickets and stuff so i know he has a single room

[redcrx]

tell him you are going on holiday with the kids at same time.#
and why are you taking out the loan in your name? A loan to invest in shares is a very risky thing to do indeed.

[B00]

I'm sorry but you must be bloody nuts to put up with this!

When exactly do you get "time alone"? Do you get holidays with him at all then? Do the kids?

And i'ts irrelevant (IMO) what this place in Corfu is like-are you happy that he's doing this to you?

[bednobs]

personally me and my husband tend to take seperate holidays, because we like diferent things. i dont care. However the fact that you do causes concern for the relationship. If he knows your concerns and dosent address them, thats different.
Also, i would be really really concerned about taking a loan out for someone else. Why can't he take it out himself. If he wants something and dosent have the money ... save up!

[bednobs]

perhaps you should tell him you are buggering off for 2 weeks and he'll have to look after the kids?

[sara3]

your daughter was 5 in this post.. http://www.theanswerb...d/Question829195.html

[dothawkes31]

Having watched too much tele and having an over active imagination, i reckon he goes away for two weeks every year and performs as a lady boy on stage and gets it out of his system for the next 50 weeks,

[suzie1]

i am sitting here right now and feeling really down about the whole thing, i cant talk to him, he just laughs everything i say off and if i dont get him this loan he will stop talking to me and this will create atmosphere in the house and i dont want the kids to be upset by it, we own the house jointly, so i cant ask him to leave coz he wont go

[suzie1]

she was 4 the last time he went away

[cazzz1975]

hmmm I wouldnt give in personally, he is acting like a spoilt child, when do you get a holiday btw?

[bednobs]

hmm - would you rather have him not speaking to you ..... or be 30 grand in debt?
you still havent said why the man cant get his own loan

[dothawkes31]

maybe the 30K is to invest in a bar on Ibiza

[sara3]

I'm still confused about your child's age!

[welshlibranr]

Sorry, but they are his children too! and he should realise that you all need a holiday as a family, as for hIm needing his own time, he has a family!! as for the loan, really silly! don't do it! if he wants to ignore you for a while, so be it! he can't get everything he wants! he should have learnt that a long time ago! but time to learn it Now!! Stick to your guns! Be brave!!.............................welsh

[joggerjayne]

What a weird arrangement.

Plus, he's depriving the kids of the chance to travel to other parts of the world.

I've been skiing with groups of families, including children aged

3 years old ... because they start skiing at that age

2 years old ... because they love to be carried around in a back-pack

3 months old ... because they are part of their family

Children are never too young to travel. That sounds like a very odd explanation.

[redcrx]

"he just laughs everything i say off and if i dont get him this loan he will stop talking to me"

so youd risk everything, the house over your children's head to avoid him not talking to you?

[NoMercy]

Me too, Sara. If she was 5 then, how come she is only 4 now?

Anway Suzie, I would tell him to take you all away, or Fluff off. I would not stand for that !!

[jno]

Don't take the loan under any circumstances. But particularly because he's trying to blackmail you into it.

[joggerjayne]

Investing in shares = POSSIBLE profit

Taking out a Loan = DEFINITE liability

Frankly, if you borrow to buy a Portfolio that includes equities, then you are stacking the odds against yourself, and you must be ...

... how can I put this delicately? ...

... NUTS !