Mad Over Fifties Club

[Igor61]

My lady has asked me to open up the Towers for this evening as she is busy with the ossifers from the local constabulary, they are still looking into the matter of our missing moat. They have at least three suspects and they have found some clues a yellow marigold, a head gasket from a 1964 Cortina and a pile of plastic buckets.
Tonight's tailcock will be the "Arctic Blast" and the hot plate special is a Mince and dumpling pie a hearty warming dish (and my favourite), the pudding tonight is a steamed apple sponge pudding, you can have custard or cream with that (I like the custard)
Those ahem musical bampots that sit in the gallery will be spouting their usual nonsense (why we can't have good old fashioned rock and roll is quite beyond me) they are also threatening to inflict their version of Bon Jovi's greatest hits on us tonight ( oh spare us!)
I expect she (who must be obeyed) will organise a rofl when she finally gets rid of those ossifers (my money is on that suspicious character next door - he has a new water feature in his back yard)
The young mistress is still in her chambers but she will be along shortly (I like her best) she has organised ice skating down at the lake, and hot chocolate and marshmallows will be available down there later. The hot tub is bubbling away as usual and I had to trudge all the way up there with all the stuff that goes in that flippin' mini bar! I've lit the fires in the snug and in the vestibule. Belle has set all the necessary requisites in the retiring rooms ready for the members.

Welcome one and all
Just remember I'll be chucking you all out at midnight (I have my chains to polish!)

[queenofmean]

awww Igor.....do you need a hand with the polish?

[mrs_overall]

Good evening Igor.
I wondered who had stolen one of my right handed marigolds. The scoundrel.
Just in case there is a rofl later I have brought

One spare left handed marigold (yellow) - in VGC and only used for cleaning household toilets
A set of keys for a Volvo I sold 10 years ago
A hand knitted cardigan for a new born orang utan. (I made the sleeves a tad too long for a real baby)
A book - The History of North Sea Gas

[Igor61]

Good evening Mistress Overall. I shall put your offerings for the rofl in the appropriate place. Do you wish me to hide the yellow glove in case it proves to be a match for the one the ossifers have?

Can I fetch you a drink?

[mrs_overall]

While you are hiding the marigold could you please check your hiding place for items I appear to have "lost" at previous soirees at the Towers.
1. Seventeen coats, various colours and styles
2. Five handbags
3. One pair of Janet Reger black silk knickers (don't ask)
4. Three arm crutches
5. Four false legs
6. Two wigs
7. A complete set of marbles

Yes, I would love a drink please

[excelsior-1]

may the deities bless good fortune upon this magnificent abode, and allow a weary freezing traveller to enter

i have had to walk here this evening, as the tardis took off on her own to attend some party or other back on gallifrey (she gets homesick)

i hope she returns for me during the night, as my rofl donations are still aboard

a large mug of hot chocolate for me please - just to get warm ... i'll switch to the tailcocks when i am settled

[tonyav]

Good evening your Igorship, How about a bucket of that ''Arctic Blast'' although we have been getting our own arctic blasts anyway for the past few days thanks.
For the roffle I have a head gasket suitable for a 1963 Ford Cortina 1500cc and a pack of 5 Woodbines circa 1968 still alright though I think and a hand book for a 1965 BSA Bantom 150cc.

[Igor61]

Your drink, madame.

I shall have Plant look into your missimg property, though I will state that Belle usually takes care of ladies lingerie items.....

[DaisyNonna]

Evening Igor, Queenie and Mrs. O. So lovely to be somewhwere with real fires. CH is so not user friendly and mine is whispers unpredictable.
Midnight is quite late enough for a witch with a narcoleptic broom. Would love a drink. In case of a raffle I have a half roll of gingham wallpaper (blue and white). Three daffodil bulbs, just finished flowering, is the expression in the green? Some rather lovely post cards of modern stained glass windows in Tewkesbury Abbey. Well worth a visit.

[nungate]

Thank you for taking ccare of things Igor.

Good evening all.

[tonyav]

Good evening mrs overend, excel, Daisy and your nungateship.

[Igor61]

. he called me your Igorship.....I like him...even if he did snitch the moat

Your drink Master AV ....

[queenofmean]

Aww Excel....you can have your usual guest room if you like?

[DaisyNonna]

Mrs. O. You are the last person I would have thought to lose your marbles.
Hi excel and tony. Lovely to be with you nungate. Were the ossifers understanding?

[Iluvspikey]

PPPPPPPPPPPPPPSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSTTTTTTTTTTTTTT - tonyav...I want a word with you about my so-call water feature

[murraymints]

Igor !! ....you've been promoted to tower master ? Where's the moat ? Don't tell me it's still not been found...I am pleased to have eventually made it here...I lost my keys last week when I did my swallow dive from the rampart....along with my sparkly...must see belle about that....anyway I had to kip down with the goats in the barn...it was freezing but I found Tonys stash and after a bottle fell asleep under a hay bale..when I woke in the morning..I couldn't get out ; a snow drift against the door had me trapped...no sustenance left I had to do something to attract help..so..I lit a wee fire ..thank God for tones disgusting cigar habit..but it grew out of hand and I feared I'd see no more tag team matches at the Liverpool empire..when I hears it....the whirleybirds of air sea rescue...an angel in a jumpsuit crashed through the roof and before I could say pink sparkly..I was clipped to a lackey and pulled up ..unfortunately the down draught whipped belles robe off...and there I was au naturelle...again....Well I became quite hysterical fearing that ossifer was around..not another night in Nick I wailed....I ended up in hossie with hypothermia....and after a psychological assessment was sectioned for 5 days....I only got here by tying up the nurse that brought my meds this morning..alas her uniform is a bit small for me...I faked an emergency call said I was nun and needed an ambulance quick...they are at the gate waiting for me to bring her down....please get rid of them whilst I get changed in belles boudoir !...any volly vonts ? I'll just have a bucket of this arctic stuff first ......Tone here yet ? Slurp...Ah ...that's nice..

[tonyav]

Thank you your Igorship.

Pssssssssttttttttt whats the matter Iluvspikey.

[excelsior-1]

hello tony and daisy

queen .. thank you very much. if my ship does not return in time, i may accept your kind offer

[Iluvspikey]

This water feature you flogged me - it's the moat isn't it? Every time my dog goes down the bottom of the garden he nearly drowns - I've had to cover it in astro turf - there's somebody looking into my garden with a telescope

[mrs_overall]

Thank you for your hospitality and company during my brief visit. I am afraid I have to depart now - I have a long standing arrangement for a night out with the girls (Naomi Campbell, Kate Moss, et al)
Have a good night all.

[DaisyNonna]

Excel I am sure your Tardis will return forthwith. What's a forth? Anyhow my Son in Law has quite a selection if you are really stuck.