Two guys are sitting in a bar and one turns to the other and says ' you look shattered'.
His mate replied ' its my girlfriend - she wants sex constantly - four/five/six times a day and wakes me up at night for it'.
An old boy overhears the conversation, leans over and says 'Marry her - that would put an end to all that nonsense!'
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I bought my wife a mood ring so I could monitor her mood swings!
When she’s in a good mood it turns green but when she’s in a bad mood it leaves a big red mark on my forehead!
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I'm about to start an online course in Forestry, but I can't login.
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In my teens, I fell in love with a one armed potholer.
After all these years I still carry a torch for her.
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Didn't know fog was addictive
Driving down the motorway I noticed they were advertising fog patches.
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