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embarrassing things kids say!!!

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mullein3 | 05:06 Fri 11th Nov 2005 | Parenting
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i am sure you all have storys to tell us of embarrassing things kids say...yesterday my daughter took the kids to a shopping centre and my grandson who is a bit loud at the best of times he is 3...was bored so he stood their shouting "i want a poo" he didnt really want one he just thought he would broadcast it..my daughter said everyone stared..i bet they thought she was denying the poor child a poo!!!!!!!!!!! he seems to be fascinated with what goes on in toilets..
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when i was 2 i sat on the bus with my mum and loudly declared that i had farted, my mum was mortified!


My brother used to scream 'take me home to my mummy' when i took him into town (i was 15 he was 3) making me look like i was stealing him lol


and my son, although he cant talk, when he was 2 and we were in a queue, in a very busy sainsburys, decided to root around down my top and proceeded to cause me to flash my bits (thank god i had a bra on) to the whole shop and wouldnt let go of my top!

Brilliant! I allowed my elder daughter (9), take my younger (6) into a loo cubicle at a shopping centre, recently. They wanted to show me how grown up they can be. Somehow my younger girls knickers slipped under the dividing wall of the cubicle and a voice suddenly screamed, 'Mummy!! Someone's stolen me knickers!' Everyone laughed and my face was as red as my hair. Minxes!!!
My son asked me very loudly in a crowded TGI Friday restaurant, "Mummy, what's an orgasm?". He had seen "screaming orgasm" on the cocktail menu.
LMAO kids are pure class :-)

This didnt happen to me i dont have any kids it was just on a funny email my mum sent, thought you would appreciate it


While in line at the bank one afternoon, my toddler decided to release some pent-up energy and ran amok. I was finally able to grab hold of her after receiving looks of disgust and annoyance from
other patrons. I told her that if she did not start behaving "right now" she would be punished. To my horror, she looked me in the eye and said in a voice just as threatening, "If you don't let me go
right now, I'll tell Grandma that I saw you kissing Daddy's pee-pee last night!". The silence was deafening after this enlightening exchange. Even the tellers stopped what they were doing. I mustered
up the last of my dignity and walked out of the bank with my daughter in tow. The last thing I heard when the door closed behind me were screams of laughter.

Taking my three-year-old daughter on the bus to nursery one day, she saw her first black person, an elderly gentleman who sat nest to us.


"Daddy!" she exclaimed, "That man's got black skin!" and everyone, including the gentleman, smiled.


"Yes, I said, he's a black man." and thought that was the end of it, but no.


Having studied the man with the intensity that only children of that age can muster, she turned to me, and in a stage whisper, audible to everyone on the bus, she confided -


"Daddy ... he's got black EARS!" and still everyone smiled, thank goodness!

My brother used to stop in the street at any doog poo and demand that my mum told him 'which doggy did that one?'
Remember very young daughter in buggy and me, in a hurry, trying to get her legs into the leg warmer thing - can't remember its name. She kept putting both legs into the same bit (deliberately) rather than one in each. Totally exasperated I shouted "for f**ks sake G******".

A week later Granny was having the same problem when my daughter shouted at her "for f**ks sake Granny"
My son went through a phase of biting people when he was about three. He bit one little girl so hard on her cheek, that she walked around for a whole week with this huge round black and blue bruise, with my son's teethmarks neatly surrounding it. That was definitely NOT funny, but I did have to smile on one occasion at Mother & Toddler club, when he had bitten his friend a couple of times on the finger. I got very cross and told him, "If you bite Matthew again, I shall take you home".
A few minutes later, he came running up to me and announced, "Mum, I've bitten Matthew again. Can we go home now?".

i am sory gef, but that just had me laughing sooo much!


when my brother learnt to speak, my mum who has a temper, shouted a**ehole to a driver who cut her up, for the next month my brother called EVERYONE he came across the same thing!

Had my son in the car as I was driving to the supermarket... OK I was doing a little above the 30mph limit but I soon slowed down when my son asked me " Mummy why is that policeman standing there with a hairdryer?"

I was putting up a shelf in my 4-year-old bedroom. I was screwing the attatchments in when he turned to me and said - Mammy your such a good screwer - your the best screwer in the nuniverse LOL


Also we went on one of those day out with Thomas things the other day (Thomas the Tank Engine) as all mums and dads know Thomas lives on the Island of Sodor. My little boy can't say Sodor and instead went round very loudly singing I'm on the Island of Sod-off at the top of his voice for the whole day !


Sorry I'm a bit late....!


Lots of little bloopers from my own but the best was from my nephew. (I've told this on here before)
My sister had taken him, aged 3, to have his hair cut. It was all going very well when he suddenly announced in a very loud voice..'Ooooh my winkie's sticking up!' The trainee, who was watching, fell off his stool laughing!


That reminds me of an incident my mother takes great delight in reminding me off in front ot people. When I was very young we were out for someones birthday with the family at a nice restaurant when I stood up and boldly announced to the world "when I see pretty girls on the telly my willy stands on end!"


As far as I know we never ate there again!

Brilliant Gevs - can't stop giggling!!! My nephew is now nearly 16 & I'm thinking that over Christmas lunch this year might be good time to remind him.........? :-)
I know someone who when she was small stood up in church to get a better view of the people standing at the front and loudly asked, 'mummy, which one's God?'

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