A man realized he needed to purchase a hearing aid, but he felt unwilling to spend much money.
"How much do they run?" he asked the clerk.
"That depends," said the salesman. "They run from £2.00 to £2,000."
"Let's see the £2.00 model," he said.
The clerk put the device around the man's neck. "You just stick this button in your ear and run this little string down to your pocket," he instructed.
"How does it work?" the customer asked.
"For £2.00 it doesn't work," the salesman replied. "But when people see it on you, they'll talk louder!"
Two deaf old guys in a railway carriage. When it stops, one says to the other, "Is this Wembley?" Other one replies, "No, it's Thursday." "So am i" says the first, "Let's go for a drink."