fatti: "They could rephrase or reword it as a poll." - OK let them a have a poll but make it clear it's not actionable.
"If the Tories don’t want Scotland as part of the UK then having a referendum ought to make no difference to them anyway, should it?" - who says they don't want Scotland?
"It’ll only reaffirm their(Tories) stance, won’t it?
What is it they’re scared of I wonder? " - The problem is the implementation, would affect the UK too. We've had enough sheet over the NI border can you imagine what Brobdingnagian mess the Scot Border would create? Not to mention the Suffering of the people of Scotland through lack of any proper infrastructure. They never answer any questions about how things would work under an "independent" Scotland. Here's the famous 10 if anyone wants another go:
https://www.theanswerbank.co.uk/News/Question1750978.html