They are now talking about banning glitter this Christmas…
Its been on the cards for years!
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When the Spanish Armada was approaching the Queen said to Drake, "Do you have sufficient ships?"
He said"No, but you can have a bite of my pasty."
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Not saying I live in a rough area but just bought an advent calendar and half the windows are boarded up!
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My son has asked for a train set for Christmas...
Can't find one anywhere so I'm getting him a replacement bus service set instead!
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At this time of year, there's nothing I love more than sitting in front of a warm fire, mulled wine in hand, singing Christmas songs until I slowly fall asleep…
Maybe that's why I'm no longer a fireman!
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I fell down the stairs in the airport the other day and hurt my arm...
Nothing serious just an airline fracture!
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What about the man who crossed an alligator with a budgerigar, he was feeding it one morning when it bit his arm off and said, "Whose a cheeky boy then?"