Is Saving £21000 Per Year Good
Family & Relationships1 min ago
Childcare
69 Answers
I'm really interested in other people's views on this.
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I'm probably very old fashioned with my views!
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I'm probably very old fashioned with my views!
Answers
Thank you. It was a struggle to raise them - no holidays for 5 years until we bought an ancient trailer tent and then we went all over Gt. Britain. They were almost the only children in their class who knew British geography and lots of history. The others just got on a plane and went to somewhere sunny with a pool. We swam in a stream on Exmoor etc..
18:27 Thu 16th Mar 2023
Sadly the days of families living on one income are long gone, unless that family is surviving entirely on benefits, if they ever really existed at all. My mother always worked albeit part time around school hours and my sisters always worked, too.
And of course there is the rise in single parent families. If there is a choice between free childcare that allows the single parent to work or supporting the entire family on benefits, then maybe free childcare is the better option.
In an ideal, perfect, fairly tale world one parent would always be at home whilst the other worked and supported the family and both parents would be happy and content with their lot.
Grandparents can't be relied on to provide free childcare - they are at work and looking after their elderly parents in their spare time.
And of course there is the rise in single parent families. If there is a choice between free childcare that allows the single parent to work or supporting the entire family on benefits, then maybe free childcare is the better option.
In an ideal, perfect, fairly tale world one parent would always be at home whilst the other worked and supported the family and both parents would be happy and content with their lot.
Grandparents can't be relied on to provide free childcare - they are at work and looking after their elderly parents in their spare time.
Well when I was a chid in the 50/60's barry it must have been 'an ideal
perfect fairy tale world' because that is exactly how it was! Mum at home, always there to greet us when we came back from school with a lovely smile and Dad out grafting for the family. Grandma and Grandad used to help out.
A different world? Yes, probably, but where did it all go wrong and why? People looked after their own kids then.
perfect fairy tale world' because that is exactly how it was! Mum at home, always there to greet us when we came back from school with a lovely smile and Dad out grafting for the family. Grandma and Grandad used to help out.
A different world? Yes, probably, but where did it all go wrong and why? People looked after their own kids then.
//In an ideal, perfect, fairly tale world one parent would always be at home //
Oh dear, the feminists will be after you. Do you have a kitchen sink to chain them to whist you are at it?
Seriously though I think attitudes have changed, women want to work (at a place of employment) and that has fuelled the economy to mean it has now become necessary especially coupled with a housing shortage that has pushed cost sky high.
It's always difficult with benefits like these but one thing working does is to help people feel part of society. Yes the tax they pay is taken back out in benefits (and sometimes more) but at least they are contributing in their own mind and that is a good thing.
Oh dear, the feminists will be after you. Do you have a kitchen sink to chain them to whist you are at it?
Seriously though I think attitudes have changed, women want to work (at a place of employment) and that has fuelled the economy to mean it has now become necessary especially coupled with a housing shortage that has pushed cost sky high.
It's always difficult with benefits like these but one thing working does is to help people feel part of society. Yes the tax they pay is taken back out in benefits (and sometimes more) but at least they are contributing in their own mind and that is a good thing.
Personally, my thoughts are about the children. Children develop in their early years far more quickly than other times in their life. I would not want my child to be brought up by people I don't know, in an environment with lots of kids and childcare workers I would want my child to have a very rounded childhood and gets their early education from parents and guardian and out there in the real everyday world, not most of it in a nursery. Personally, I wouldn't have a child if I couldn't bring the child up in the way I want. I worked in a school where the less bright girls all seemed to want to work as nursery staff.. Would I want my child to be in the care of people who were not very bright! Yes, admit I'm a bit of a snob ! I was prepared and happy to spend 4 or 5 years not working and putting my child's needs . first. So we managed on a very tight budget with Dad working full time and mum finding part time evening work and lived a frugal life until he was school age.
I'll add more to this later.
I'll add more to this later.
From what I have seen of Nurseries they do a lot with the kids, including a significant amount of education. Being collective they have far more in the way of 'toys' that most could not afford. Reports/assessments and photos are regularly sent. Saw one just the other day with pictures of the two year old making scones and playing shops.
This setting also enables the child to socialise, something I think is very important in this day and age where people immerse themselves in games and/or phones. Very difficult to get this in a 'family' setting, for instance there are kids from all backgrounds in the one I have been to. How many families could do that?
I can understand why some feel it is not for them and that is fine too. There is no right or wrong on this subject.
This setting also enables the child to socialise, something I think is very important in this day and age where people immerse themselves in games and/or phones. Very difficult to get this in a 'family' setting, for instance there are kids from all backgrounds in the one I have been to. How many families could do that?
I can understand why some feel it is not for them and that is fine too. There is no right or wrong on this subject.
//Personally, I wouldn't have a child if I couldn't bring the child up in the way I want//
Sometime it's not that simple. Life happens. I got divorced and my sons father would not contribute financially and rarely wanted to see my son. Not the way I wanted or thought I would be bringing up my son. I wanted to work for income, my sanity, and as a good example to my son, and that meant having friends look after him at times and I would return the favour for them. I would have loved to had free childcare available where he would have been taking part in activities and socialising with others his age instead.
Sometime it's not that simple. Life happens. I got divorced and my sons father would not contribute financially and rarely wanted to see my son. Not the way I wanted or thought I would be bringing up my son. I wanted to work for income, my sanity, and as a good example to my son, and that meant having friends look after him at times and I would return the favour for them. I would have loved to had free childcare available where he would have been taking part in activities and socialising with others his age instead.
My child socialised - with adults in all sorts of situations and with lots of children at playgroups where parents also took part. He was far more able to go off to school with confidence. His behaviour, confidence, language skills and worldly knowledge was far greater than those in nursery schools . And I had the pleasure of his company. I really enjoyed being a Mum.
I understand that nurseries are essential for some, but it seems now that everyone sends their kids to nurseries regardless. It's almost seen as essential
Lets face it, the reason behind free childcare is basically to boost the economy not for the benefit of children or parents.
I'm just glad that I was a Mummy in different times.
I understand that nurseries are essential for some, but it seems now that everyone sends their kids to nurseries regardless. It's almost seen as essential
Lets face it, the reason behind free childcare is basically to boost the economy not for the benefit of children or parents.
I'm just glad that I was a Mummy in different times.
And it's got nothing to do with being a feminist or not. I hate that wo
word. I always was an independent lady. My OH would gladly have taken on the chief carer role and let me be the breadwinner!
Basically, we wouldn't have considered being parents if it meant sending babies to nurseries at 9months to 2years old.
word. I always was an independent lady. My OH would gladly have taken on the chief carer role and let me be the breadwinner!
Basically, we wouldn't have considered being parents if it meant sending babies to nurseries at 9months to 2years old.
What are couples to do if both work, they have a typical large mortgage, but want to start a family? Once parental leave has been used up, (we'll assume) mother will want to go back to work...particularly if she's invested time and effort to get to a well paid position. Or even if she hasn't...her income is required. Even if her return is part time, child care is needed...most likely sooner rather than later.
It's simply one if the sad necessities of modern life.
It's simply one if the sad necessities of modern life.
I can't agree Pasta. I don't think you can have everything you want in life. If a career is more important than bringing up your child yourself then don't have children. Those earyl years are so very important to acnilds development. My child was born in the years of horrendous mortgage interests. We had to manage.
I went back to almost full time work in a good job when my son went to school at 4.
I went back to almost full time work in a good job when my son went to school at 4.
Then I'm old-fashioned too. Some women want to work - but I'm willing to bet that most would prefer to raise their children themselves - at least until they start school. I did.
That does penalise parents (usually Mum) horribly - as it did me - but both my girls began school able to read well (one had a R.Age of 9); knew their numbers up to 20; could add and take away; fasten their own shoes; use a knife and fork etc., etc.. They also learnt about gardening and growing food because I couldn't afford to buy much!
I know that some parents need both working and it will help them tremendously - but I think the country would benefit more in the long term by a population of well-raised children.
Yes, nurseries do a good job, usually - but the nurturing element is just not the same. I wanted to raise a child I could relate to - not one raised by strangers.
That does penalise parents (usually Mum) horribly - as it did me - but both my girls began school able to read well (one had a R.Age of 9); knew their numbers up to 20; could add and take away; fasten their own shoes; use a knife and fork etc., etc.. They also learnt about gardening and growing food because I couldn't afford to buy much!
I know that some parents need both working and it will help them tremendously - but I think the country would benefit more in the long term by a population of well-raised children.
Yes, nurseries do a good job, usually - but the nurturing element is just not the same. I wanted to raise a child I could relate to - not one raised by strangers.
