Adoption

[flip-flop]

In the interest of equality, same sex couples are to be given the same adoption rights as heterosexual couples (which in the real world means they will be favoured to ensure the authoritiers are shown to be actively placing kids with same sex couples).

Is this right? Arent a man and a woman better suited to raise children?

[Drisgirl]

The goalposts have changed in the past 40 years.What was perceived as a 'normal' coupling then has changed radically.

I am of the opinion that when same sex couples are being considered for adoption it would be sensible for the couples to ensure the child would have loving access to the opposite sex to them for balance.However there is nothing to stop a woman to become pregnant independant of the adoption process and continue to live with her partner.

In conclusion as long as the child is being brought up in a healthy happy loving environment that is good enough for me.I dont see the same sex issue as being an issue.I await the floodgates to open :)

[Quizmonkey]

Ask yourself whether ANY combination of man and woman (taking into account personalities, psychologies, intelligence, etc) can be claimed to be better than any two men/women and the answer has to be that "a man and a woman" are not automatically better suited.

[Oneeyedvic]

I would just point out that the law has been changed so that hetrosexual couples and same sex couples now have the same rights as married couples. Before the change in law, unmarried hetrosexual couples could not adopt - only one person in the relationship could be the legal parent.

In (my) ideal world, I do believe that a child should be raised by a male & female parent, however this not being an ideal world, I feel that so long as there is a loving, stable environment either hetro or same sex couples should be able to adopt.

[AliFlump]

There is some arguement that a man and woman would give a balanced upbringing to a child, in respect that they have a person of each sex to turn to

But after saying that i dont have a problem with same sex couples having children. As long as the child is brought up in a safe, loving environment i think thats all that matters.

Just because a person is homosexual they shouldn't be denied the basic human right of bringing up a child.

[stevie_c2it]

Although I�d agree with almost everything written so far, I don�t believe being allowed to raise a child is a �basic human right�, surely it should be seen as a serious responsibility and a privilege?

[AliFlump]

Of course its a serious responsibility Steve but i think everyone should be able to have a child (providing they are in the correct state of mind which is why adopting agencies do their checks)

Afterall thats the reason we are all here, to reproduce and continue the human race.

Please dont think i am being flippant with a childs life, i just wanted to get the point across that everyone should be able to bring up a child if they so wish, no matter what their sexual orientation

[stevie_c2it]

I agree with what you are saying Aliflump, but I just felt that there was a danger of misinterpretation in making a statement along the lines of �it�s a basic human right� to be able to raise children. Actually it�s always surprised me that, although you need a licence to drive a car in order to prove your cable of handling and controlling it safely, anyone can bring a child into the world without the least preparation or proof of fitness. So in my opinion, its right to support the raising of children by people (gay or straight) who have been prepared to demonstrate there commitment by �jumping through the hoops� required by the agencies.

[Englishbird]

Agree with all the above really, I'd far rather a loving stable same sex couple brought up a child, than an abusive vile mixed sex couple. Some single mothers bring up perfectly rounded children, some don't, some family's do and some don't, and inevitably some gay couples will and some wont.

So maybe there is a conventional ideal, but it's far from the guarantee of bringing up decent children.

[Englishbird]

Sorry, that should be 'single parents' not 'single mothers'

[Ward-Minter]

What is this world coming to? Knowing that other kids are horrible to one another just because one kid has "the wrong trainers" or "mobile phone" what will they make of having gay parents?

Bless their hearts, it's not their fault.

Loving environment??? Gay people were genentically made gay. I don't have a problem with that. It is therefore those genes that make them childless.

Those who say being gay is unnatural are a little ignorant but clearly being a gay parent is not only an oxymoronic situation, it is biologically and indeed morally wrong diddly wrong.

Gay rights?? What about the right of the child!!!

[campbellking]

The child is best off in whatever provides a happy stable home. I have a couple of lesbian friends who adopted a baby with Downs Syndrome around 10 years ago. She's happy, healthy and doing well in a mainstream school. Such children are often hard to place due to public prejudices about syndromes they have little knowledge of. I don't feel she would be enjoying a better life in a children's home. I equally have heterosexual friends who have successfully adopted children.

[noxlumos]

As a victim of serious physical abuse by my (heterosexual) father as a child, the repercussions of which I am still living with on a daily basis, I can earnestly say ward minter, that it doesn't matter a rat's a**e what your sexuality is when raising children, it's your basic ability to be a loving nurturing parent that's important, and if other kids bully a child for having "gay" parents then that really only goes to prove that some heteroexual couples children can be mindless vindictive bullies, whose parent's clearly have negative and stereotypical values which they have passed on to their offspring, so that's scarcely an argument for not allowing gay couples to adopt.

I genuinely believe that same sex couples, mixed sex couples or single individuals of either sex are all equally able to raise a child, it just depends on the suitability of the people as human beings

[ianess]

At the risk of yet again being labelled as homophobic, an accusation that I most strenuously deny, it is a fact that very few babies become available for adoption.
This could possibly be for a variety of reasons, single mothers raising their own child or the unborn child being aborted possibly being in my opinion the most common.
That being said, the child available for adoption is very often old enough to have their opinions taken into account, and in my experience many are making it known that they want a mummy and a daddy.
This is still accepted as being classed as what constitutes a "normal" family situation.
No matter what the politically correct decision may be we should never forget that the most important aspect of the adoption process is and always must be, that which is best for the child.
As stated elsewhere there are no qualifications required to produce offspring, but being or becoming a parent is a privilege and not a right.

[joko]

orphanages are full of children who want parents of ANY description, and wouldn't care what 'format' they came in.

there are so many children being deprived of love, care and affection, either through being orphaned - or abandoned by an apparently 'normal' couple.

Love and caring should come from whoever wants to give it.

i'll bet there are many kids who would swap their mother and father for a caring gay couple in a heartbeat if it stopped the abuse and neglect.

regarding the school bullying, yes you are probably right, but as you said, they bully for all sorts of stupid reasons, so if it isn't this it would be something else anyway - some kids get bullied for a parent being terminally ill or dead!!! there are no limits with some bullies - so theres no point in trying to stop this for that reason.

it is not the fact of gay parents that would harm a child - its the bigots and homophobes who would attack them for it. they only learn its even an issue by the bile they receive not the love.

the more we expose young children to the idea, the more it becomes accepted, and over time it will be accepted as 'normal'

[libertie]

As long as they are capable of giving a child a happy, safe and secure home I don't see that it should be a problem.....after all you only have to look at some recent cases where children have been horrendously neglected and abused in homes with so called "normal heterosexual" parents!!

[ianess]

joko......I'm afraid that your final sentence scares the h*ll out of me. Highly debatable as part of the adoption issue, but in a wider context that very statement has been used to start wars, with both sides claiming to have their God and God's Laws to support their version of what's right or normal.
Just because we're told something often enough doesn't necessarily make it right.

[Englishbird]

No, but people are naturally wary of new or different things and ideas, and that doesn't necessarily make them wrong.

[WoWo]

Personally I don't have a problem with it. But....

"Just because a person is homosexual they shouldn't be denied the basic human right of bringing up a child."

I don't think having a baby is a human right. At least not if you are unwilling to go throught the biological process yourself through choice.

Having said that I'm not sure of the legal situation with regard to surrogant mothers etc (for male couples).

[flashpig]

Ward-Minter, if gay people are genetically gay, then 'gay parent' can't be oxymoronic, as they have had the gay gene passed down to them. There have been plenty of gay parents in the past.

Also, gay people adopting cannot be any more biologically wrong than straight people adopting, as it is not their biological child.

Though, if there is a gay gene the adoption thing could be a sinister eugenics program to eradicate it. If gay people can adopt kids they'll stop having biological children and the gene will not survive.

Morally (apart from the breeding out of gay people, but they only have their genes to blame) I don't have a problem with it. The adoption process is a very good one. A lot of jumping through hoops, but also a lot of time spent with social workers prying on you. I don't think they'd put a kid with anyone who wouldn't make a good parent and having 2 good parents is what is best for the child in the end.

[stevie_c2it]

Flashpig, that is the �conspiracy theory� to end all �conspiracy theories�. Wish I�d thought of it. Damn!