Charlotte Wyatt

[bluevern]

Is it just me.. or does anyone else think her parents kept her alive for their own selfish reasons.......They have split up and now dont want to see her and put her up for adoption........How sad!

[lynbrown]

The dad already had 4 to another lady before he had more with Charlotte's mum - poor kids, all of them.

[Hammer Head]

The mother fought in court for this child to be kept alive against the advice of doctors. She should be given the child and be told to get on with it. The authorities wanted to do the decent thing but this stupid woman thought she knew better.

[bluevern]

Well said!!
I know it sounds really heartless, but lets hope this poor little girl never understands what a useless family she has

[Goodsoulette]

I really dont think they are useless. I think that having a severely disabled child would test any relationship (my aunt split with her husband after her daughter became severely ill with encephalitis). I can understand the mother feeling unable to care for her other children but on the same note I can understand the father wanting social services to provide carers to help his daughter so ha can work to provide a better life. My aunts daughter is 16, she fits up to 18 times a day, cannot speak, is blind, canoot hear in one ear, has autism and is pretty viloent times. When your child is that disabled carers dont really stick with the kids for that long, they tend to put in a couple of months and leave for something easier. My aunt has never been offered respite outside of the family and even then not that many people offer, she gets about 4 hours help a week, which is paid for and provided by her daughter in law.

I hope she can stay with one of her parents and that he gets the adequate support. If she was fostered out the home helps would be ladled out, so why not when with the natural parents.

I dont know whether I would have been able to accept a DNR on one of my children so as a single mum I could well be in a similar situation myself had that been me.

[bluevern]

Whether or not its one or two parents bringing her up, they must have know it wasn't going to be easy looking after her. So why fight to keep her alive, when her quality of life is poor and then bale out on her.
I don't think they thought this through properly!!

But I do hope she gets all the love and care she needs in her new home

[Goodsoulette]

natural instinct to want to keep your child alive.. I dont think thinking these things out properly come into it.

[Lonnie]

I think Goodsoulette is right in what she says, I speak from having a handicapped daughter myself, although not as bad as her Aunts daughter.

Its really hard looking after somone like Charlotte, trying to keep house, and looking after othe children, Yes, she fought for her childs life, what mother wouldn't, and at the time, she probably wasn't looking ahead to the aftercare, when she realised that she couldn't cope.

I shouldn't slag her off until her side is heard.

[noxlumos]

I'm flabberghasted at the ******* lack of understanding shown by a few posters on this thread.
Drs are NOT always right, they are often wrong, and it is a parents most fundamental quality to fight for the survival of their child. The levels of stress they have been put through with Drs trying to play God when the initial decisions should have been theirs, must have been horrific. They fought court battle after court battle. Imagine having years on end of abject terror that Drs were going to let your percious child die when you 100% thought that was an inappropriate decision to make. I'm amazed either of them are still sane.
I have 2 children who have "disabilities", one who is deaf and one who is possibly ASD and they worried me enough and have been enough work, never mind a child like little Charlotte. Their issues are nothing to Charlottes'.
I understood her father actually wants custody of her but social services won't help sfficiently and they are opposing it as they don't think he'll cope alone, which I'd imagine is quite likely.
Have a heart people, no-one is perfect and I am sure they have known worry, terror and heartache such as I hope none of us will know.

[noxlumos]

I'm not sure why "u t t e r" is asterisked out??!!??

[Lonnie]

Well said Nox.

[netibiza]

It's a very sad time for all concerned. I guess the parents didn't know how hard it would be to look after their daughter, but there again, one doesn't wish death on an innocent child.

[bednobs]

the doctors didnt want to kill her, only not to resuscitate her if she deteriorated. As far as i know from the news, she never deteriroated anyway, so actually the issue of resus never came up, despite the court battel

[louisa06]

I'm sorry but if that was my flesh and blood i would not give her up for NO BODY regardless of her quality of life

I would somehow find the strength to care for her
i would fight to the death for her

there is know excuse's

poor little girl !

[sandbach99]

The medical and social services staff are partly to blame in the parents decision to separate, they needlessly caused both parents so much stress and anxiety by taking them to court to try to prove they were right and the parents were wrong.

The doctors were still maintaining the baby could not see or hear when it was plain to see that she could, the doctors maintained she had not improved when she had.

Now social services refuse to give the care package the father says he needs to care for her, but will be happy to pay foster parents to care for her.

[netibiza]

Hear hear louisa06 every mother's thought.

[Goodsoulette]

People are making out neither parent wants to care for her, which isn't the case.

Its only because it was high profile in the first place we know about it. There are lots of children that require 24 hour care that are in care homes or at schools which offer mon-fri respite and you would think no less of them for doing that, as often these places have better facilities. 24 hour access to medical staff, physiotherapy, and a fresh set of staff every 8 hours. Not just one or 2 people who feel trapped.

When the parents get offered 24 hour help from carers, respite weekends everynow and then, physio and days at homes that specialise in helping disabled children. We are judging a mum and dad on something that hasnt even happened yet.

[Hammer Head]

louisa06 - 'there are no excuses'.

[WendyS]

I just think it's a incredibly sad , partially because nobody was able to emotionally detach themselves sufficiently to consider all the "what if's?" and possible long term consequences of this case. I suppose it's hardly surprising that all the stress and publicity caused the couple to split, but considering the vast amount of public money that has been spent on legal issues and keeping this poor child alive, it's a pity that some more support couldn't be given to enable one of the parents to continue with the responsibility they were initially fighting to have, i.e. continue caring for their child.

[libertie]

Don't think that anyone can say how they would feel unless they were unfortunate enough to be in the same position! No doubt the parents did what they thought was best for their daughter at the time, think it's an absolute tragedy for all concerned and find myself slightly disgusted at the holier than thou attitude adopted by some people!!